One switch per ball cause everyone knows the girl sperm is in the left testicle and the boy sperm in the right.
The Shitpost Office
Welcome to The Shitpost Office
Shitposts processed from 9 to 5, with occasional overtime on weekends.
Rule 1: Be Civil, Not Sinister
Treat others like fellow employees, not enemies in the breakroom.
- No harassment, dogpiling, or brigading
- No bigotry (transphobia, racism, sexism, etc.)
- Respect people’s time and space. We’re here to laugh, not to loathe
Rule 2: No Prohibited Postage
Some packages are simply undeliverable. That means:
- No spam or scams
- No porn or sexually explicit content
- No illegal content
- NSFW content must be properly tagged
If you see anything that violates these rules, please report it so we can return it to sender. Otherwise? Have fun, be silly, and enjoy the chaos. The office runs best when everyone’s laughing.... or retching over the stench, at least.

I had a unilateral orchiectomy due to torsion as a teenager and my father had to be repeatedly reassured that one didn't need to "mix the juice" from both to impregnate someone.
There's nothing finer than a United States education!
girlfriend giving me a seductive massage
"Yes yes yes!"
Accidentally toggle my balls to 'Mad Max Mode'
"No no nooooooooooooooooooo!"
WITNESS ME!!!
"Dear subscriber, thank you for trusting your reproductive organs to Microballs. It's been our pleasure to serve you, but unfortunately we need to tell you that support for your genitals is being discontinued in 30 days, after which time paid features such as 'arousal' and 'having an orgasm' will no longer be available."
What was it again, up is off right? Right?
That's why you need an LED indicator
My balls are already equipped with rgb lights. Very festive. Maybe a speaker? Robotic lady voice: "Lock engaged. Enjoy your intercourse.", "Lock disengaged. Careful, this thing's loaded."
Make it Kurt Russell and you've got yourself a deal
"Have you tried turning them off then on again?"
Self destruction activated.