this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2025
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[–] Yerbouti@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Let's all send sperm to the white house to contribute to the data collection. I'm willing to throw in some fresh Canadian sperm to help, and I'll use nudes of the US first lady to jerk off! Let's show rfk our support by literally drowning him in sperm!

[–] Blumpkinhead@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Let's show rfk our support by literally drowning him in sperm!

This dude likes to swim in raw sewage and eat roadkill. You think drowning in ball yogurt is going to break his stride?

[–] davidagain@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Let's assume there are 340million americans, half of whom have no penis and a fifth of whom are under 18. That leaves 4/10 or 136 million men. Lets say the ejaculate 5ml each, so that 200 men make a litre and 200 litres fill a bath, so 40000 men fill a bath. Easy. Swimming pool? 25mx10mx1.5m=3750 cubic metres or 3 750 000 000 000 litres. It'll take too long because each man needs to donate about 10000 litres, and I don't care how much jizz he's claiming the over 65s are making, they'll all have heart attacks if they try that.

We need a compromise of a hot tub sort of quantity. Say 2000 litres, (450 gallons or so in freedumb units) so we just need 400 000 men, well under 1% of potential donors. Very doable.

However, on a practical note, if a man took 10 seconds to make his donation to RFK's hot tub jizz bukkake drowning pool, and ten men can surround it at once, even with military timing, that's only 60 per minute, 3600 per hour, that's 111 hours or about 5 days and nights non stop jizzing at an absolute minimum. It's gonna go cold and stale, so whether it gunks up the nozzles or not, I think we owe it to RFK for him to go out comfy and we'd best leave the heat and bubbles on as he is gradually overwhelmed by spunk.

This has been a public information announcement. No guarantees are made as to accuracy or fitness for any purpose whatsoever.

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[–] krooklochurm@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 weeks ago

RFK JR: "I've swallowed the loads of thousands of men and boys over the years and the recent decline in the amount of aperm, the taste of the sperm, and the texture of the sperm, makes my brain worms very unhappy"

[–] Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 weeks ago

WHY IS HE COLLECTING TEENAGER'S SPERM?!

[–] aesthelete@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Sounds great, like these kids nowadays know the key to a healthy masturbation routine

[–] bomberesque@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

teenagers today have less semen up their arses from 65 year old men

Ftfy

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[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I wonder if Cheryl Hines doesn't get invited to as many hollywood parties these days bc her husband is fucking the country

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[–] Rakonat@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

Doesn't matter how this administration spins it, we aren't going to condone them fucking teenage girls.

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The man is a crackpot and a con artist, so anything he says on this topic is less than worthless.

Anyway, fascists are always obsessed with their stunted concepts of virility. Look at the racist concept that Black men are more sexual than white ones, or Alex Jones's gay frogs rant.

Here's a real fact: there is a strong correlation between a man having higher percent body fat and lower sperm motility. And if you look at long-term trends relating to body fat percentage, they're rising like mad in the US and at a slower rate in much of Europe. Some of that might be lifestyle issues such as longer working hours and higher stress, but there's also some evidence that certain nearly ubiquitous chemicals act as hormone disruptors.

[–] Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Oh I'm sorry, I thought we are all behind abstinence only sex Ed, so teenagers having low sperm count shouldn't matter to them right?

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[–] Archangel1313@lemmy.ca 9 points 2 weeks ago

smh. What an absolute moron.

[–] mhague@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

8 men who can't get an erection without gender-affirming boner pills: Young boys have less virility the than 65yo men.

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[–] Blumpkinhead@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

RFK Jr obsessed with teenage boy jizz. Just your average MAGA weirdo.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 8 points 2 weeks ago

Ok Bob, I'll need you to successfully wank five times a day for a month.

Then we'll talk

[–] M0oP0o@mander.xyz 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Is RFK Jr milking them? Why is this a talking point? Is this some slope into bringing back eugenics?

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Is RFK Jr milking them?

Given this admin and its total safe guard of the Epstein Files... Maybe.

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[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Sperm counts and testosterone have been dropping rapidly but I didn't think teens were now worse off than 65 YOs

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

also 65yo are likely to have defective sperm more than teens.

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[–] discocactus@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

Real big issue for the people who fuck kids.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 weeks ago

This com keeps peaking

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 weeks ago

He also says it tastes funny.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 6 points 2 weeks ago

Thats because he's hanging around 65+ year old Republicans that steal semen from little kids.

[–] WanderWisley@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Are they saying that they want 65 year old men to impregnate teenagers? Island boys together strong.

[–] Aljernon@lemmy.today 5 points 2 weeks ago

If that's the case, whats your big plan for dealing with microplastics, Robert

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