this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2025
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For context, I’m circumcised and expecting a son and my wife and I are torn about the circ. We’re American so from a cultural standpoint circumcision is the default choice. Thing is, there’s no real benefit besides practicing a religion we don’t believe in, and I’m uncomfortable about cutting the tip of my son’s dick off.

On the other side, I’ve met a guy who was bullied in high school so bad for it he got a circ as an adult. Apparently crazy painful recovery. I’ve also talked to women who are generally grossed out by uncircumcised men. I don’t want to make him feel like something’s wrong with him his whole life because I was uncomfortable with the idea.

From a moral standpoint I’m against it, but from a social and cultural standpoint I feel like I should do it? It’s a crappy situation. If there’s any uncircumcised American men who want to talk about their penis I’m all ears.

Edit: I really appreciate everyone’s responses I never expected to hear from so many people. With the decision hinging on social and cultural norms it’s been really helpful to be able to take the temperature like this. I obviously need to talk to my wife, but given the overwhelming support of dick hats I don’t thing we’re going to do it. Thanks, lemmings!

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[–] Victoriathecompact@sh.itjust.works 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

bullying someone cause they're intact and youre not is a trauma response. kidding but also not

[–] MagicShel@lemmy.zip -1 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Circ'd here but I've struggled with this decision myself. Lucked out in the matter and had girls. Society has changed. Circ rates have recently fallen just below 50% national average (much higher in the Midwest).

If your only reason for considering it is to match his peers, you can have no concerns either way.

That said, I do think people make a much bigger deal about this decision than it really is 99% of the time. You're going to make thousands of decisions for your kids and most are more impactful than whether they have a penis hat or not. Saw someone here saying circing flat out makes you a bad parent. I don't expect they are a parent because that's not the kind of decision that keeps me up at night wondering if I fucked up, you know?

Go with your gut and it'll be fine.

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[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com -2 points 5 months ago (6 children)

This one of those topics where you will only get one side because the options are very very strong and anyone voice that deviates from a "no" will be silenced and they know it so they just won't participate here.

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[–] thedeadwalking4242@lemmy.world -2 points 5 months ago (3 children)

No, but look up proper maintenance if you decide not to. It requires additional cleaning considerations

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