Lord Of The Rings Memes

• Lord Denethor, Your son has returned.
• Who, Boromir?
• No the other one.
• Fuck him.

Okay if we're changing the movies, I'm going to say it again. Put Bombadil back in.

Then, he's all "Eldest, that's what I am... Tom remembers the first raindrop and the first acorn... he knew the dark under the stars when it was fearless – before the Dark Lord came from Outside."

And then Pippin can whisper "what the fuck".

A BLACK ARROW suddenly THUDS into BOROMIR'S chest.
BOROMIR
Fuck me, not again.

3 f-bombs. One per movie.

A "What the fuck"belongs after Bilbo does the face.

Aragorn: "Gentlemen, we do not stop 'til nightfall."

Pippin: "What about breakfast?"

Aragorn: "You've already had it."

Pippin: "We've had one, yes. What about second breakfast?"

Merry: "I don't think he knows about second breakfast, Pip."

Pippin: "What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?"

Aragorn: "Shut the fuck up"

"Poh-tah-toes... Boil em, fuck em, put em in a stew?"

The fellowship of the ring: Gimli could quietly say "fuck..." as he hears the drums in the deep.

The two towers: Aragorn could yell it as he kicks the helmet.

The return of the king: perhaps when Sam fights the spider? Or maybe one of the sailors as the undead army runs towards them across the water.

Those would be my suggestions, though I think the movies are better off without it of course.

Well there are 3 movies, so technically you would get 1 fuck (or fuck equivalent) per movie. Everyone wants the Fuck to be funny, but that doesn't necessarily mean it should be.

I think for Fellowship I would put it at the Balrog arriving and uttered by Gandalf, he's the only person who understands the situation and a fuck would punctuate the seriousness of the situation.

For The Two Towers I think I'd make it happy/exasperated and give it to Aragorn as the Elves of Rivendell arrive (not book accurate, but also not the question).

For Return of the King I think it kinda has to go to Sam as he is reacting to Frodo crashing out. "Fuck, Mr. Frodo we've got to go on."

Just one take, not the best or the last.

It needs to be somewhere trivial, like a character stubbing their toe, or just coming to a decision, rather than somewhere momentous.

It's the only way it will become a meme 😇

Also, the phrase "devour feculence and expire"¹ can be uttered in a G-rated movie at any time, so you really don't need to drop the word Fuck to make an impact.

¹ Eat Shit and Die - shamelessly stolen and expanded on fron the series Severance. (Originally: "devour feculence")

Need more pedestrian uses. When they reach Bree:

"Hobbits! Four hobbits! What business brings you to Bree?"

Frodo: "We wish to stay at the inn. Our business is our fucking own."

Council of Elrond - the last of the participants are trickling in as it's about to start: slightly in the background, you see Samuel L Jackson approach in full Jedi garb, but is stopped by a guard. You can't hear anything they're saying, as the camera is still focused on the actual event that's now kicking off, but you can see an increasingly heated exchange between Jackson and the guard, with Jackson producing a paper document and pointing to it, then to the council. The guard takes the paper and begins reading it as Jackson crosses his arms and waits in an annoyed 'hurry up' pose. The guard then shows the document to Jackson while pointing to a specific word, then points back to the council while explaining something, still unheard.

Jackson snatches the document, angrily stomps, and a barely audible "mother fucker!!" is heard by the audience as he turns around and storms away.

"Throw it in the fire, Mr. Frodo." Sam shouted.

Frodo looked back at Sam, his eyes suddenly darkening. Though no words came from the now haggard hobbit's mouth, the look told Sam everything.

His shoulders sagged.

"Aw, fuck..." He sighed.

I think gandalf should say it. He has to deal with a lot of bullshit in this story.

When Frodo wakes up at night because the other Hobbits are cooking supper on an open fire, instead of keeping a low profile, "What the fuck is wrong with You, put it out" or something like that.

Fly you dumb fucks.

Fucking fool of a Took!

"Gandalf, what's the Elvish word for friendship?"

"Fuck."

Doors of Moria grind open

Gollum in the teasing coming from above: "You thieves! You thieves… You fucking little thieves! Where is it? Where is it? They stole it from us. My Precious."

"One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them; one ring to bring them all and in the darkness fuck them." -Gandalf the Grey

When they knock the skeleton down the well and it calls the horde.

Come, my friends. The ents are going to fuck shit up.

A fucking Balrog. A demon of the ancient world. This foe is beyond any of you. Run!

Fuck Frodo!

"Deep in the land of Mordor, in the Fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged a master ring in secret, and into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One ring to fuck them all."

"One doesnt simply walk into mordor you fuck"

"never thought I'd die fighting side by side with an elf"

"How about side by side with a fucking friend"

"They are tricksy, false, wicked, clever fucking hobbitses!"