Witches VS Patriarchy

To me, single mother/father isn't negative. It's simply a way to explain their situation; that they are raising a child by themselves and for whatever reason they don't have a partner.

Honestly the first time I've heard someone think of it in a negative way. Mostly I hear people say single mother/father with sincere respect as they know raising a kid is difficult, and can't imagine doing it by themselves.

*Quick edit to affirm the fact that single fathers are relatively rare as we live in a patriarchy.

Why are you assuming that "single mother" is a bad thing? Thats pretty fucking weird.

Why is she wearing a belt buckle of people 69ing?

Baring psycho religious idiots, do people really use "single parent" as a pejorative? I've only ever considered it an indication of the unique struggles the description entails, not as a judgment on them.

I feel like a widowed mother might not appreciate this

Since when is calling someone a single mother “blaming” them?

I like that you post a lot, but I feel like there are some stinkers in there that don't pass the smell test. There's a plenty of single parents that actively keep past partners from their children. Often enough this is against their child's and former partners wishes. Some even want to hurt their exes by removing their child.

That being said the stereotype does certainly exist, but reality to me is more complex with less gender related lines. And pushing conservative gender roles is a yikes.

Isn't this a very old and irrelevant way of thinking, but placed on a modern styled meme format, in order to maybe state a different problem?

Being single parents is not more derogatory that being a cat owner or having bangs

Why does she have a colostomy bag?

The single parent is the focus of importance to the discussion. Simply mentioning a thing isn't dissing it.

It's not uncommon that people choose to be a single mother. So saying that it's a problem is bad.

This kinda feels like right wing propaganda they are obsessed with "the father not being around"

I am not denying there are fathers who don't take responsibility for having a child

Well, he could have died. Just sayin.

Fuck all that. I spent thousands on a lawyer just to get my kids 3-months a year. I've spent 10's of thousands on child support. And I'm the problem?

In addition to what everyone else said, the terms just refer to completely different people. "single mother" obviously refers to the mother, while "children of absentee fathers" refers to... the children.

And it's a strawman anyways - nobody's out there using "single mother" as a pejorative. I've heard it used far more often in a good sense.

In my very specific case, my mother kidnapped me, she moved, she hid, she kept my location and presence a mystery from my father's side of the family for like eight, seven years of my life, and the only reason that that got broken was because I, as a teenager, hunted down my father, after which he was a part of my life again, and my mother resented him for that and still made it difficult for him.

Just like most men, most women are actually good.

But the bad ones are really bad.

I've never thought that term carried any stigma other than "this person is working harder than most do to survive"

That doesn't even make sense.

The first is talking about the child, the second about the mother.

I always thought this was more for the child's benefit. Rather than addressing them by what they are lacking addressing them by what they have might be gentler.

Deadbeat Dads

"children of absentee fathers"... instead of "single mothers"? or instead of "children of single mothers"? i don't disagree with the point, but the lack of clarity in the phrasing is really bugging me... it's probably just pedantry, it's not a big deal

well, i guess i would agree that it's usually not derogatory. i think it's probably a little nicer in reference to the child as well, since it doesn't as strongly imply they're totally fucked for life like saying "children of absentee fathers", cause at least they have a mom, you know?

sorry to change the topic. but what are those pants and accessories (besides the belt buckle). they look cool and I don't recognise them.

I always interpreted the concept of single mother to be made to highlight the "she's is doing it alone girlboss" rather than "she chose that". either way it's not ideal though

They aren’t the problem, they’re the one getting the recognition.

Cool slop bro

Single 'father' here, and I don't give a fuck what you call it, I'll make the best of it but it fucking sucks

I think this post is the one that will make me finally unsubscribe and leave this commmunity. It's so many brigaders here now and it's not fun or productive anymore. I might return some time in the future, but I fought the good fight and I'm ready to be done.

Open discourse is fine, but you can really only have a community like this work if enough people accept the core premise. I'm not sure Lemmy can support that kind of userbase.

Best of luck, everyone.

Just a bit of a mouthful, isn't it? If you're going to give notes on the English language, you gotta bring your A-game. Off the top of my head, "mom solo". I'm sure there are better ideas, just don't ask us to replace handy phrases with boring full sentences.