Ask Lemmy

I’m 28. I hang out with one friend at least 1-3 times a week. I see the rest of them once every few months, but we’re all in discord pretty frequently. I also have friends in the local kink scene I see relatively often depending on how many events I go to.

I have no friends

3-4x per week

• 25-30 living with a flatmate, seeing friends and being sociable & fun all the time, probably 6 days a week on average.

• In my 30s, living alone, having a longer commute and more responsible job, still made the effort to see different friends, with something bigger (dinner or game night) once a week. So seeing folks 3 / 7 days.

• 40s moved with partner to a different country. So now it's seeing friends 4 times a year when I go home, and another 2 or 3 times when they come visit. Definitely less than I'm happy with, and sometimes it's a source of frustration, but it's mostly OK. It's nice having the different experience of having a friend stay for a week, feels a little like being a teen when friends would sleep over.

I need to improve my language skills so I can spend time with my partners friends here. But because of demands of life, work, renovations, etc I think that even if my friends lived around, it would be closer to once/twice a week. Also, it's worth noting that as well as having lots of good friends who enjoy spending time with each other, I'm lucky to have lots of friends without kids or busy careers. One of my closest friends has both those things, and we really struggle to even fit a videocall in. But my autistic crafter buddy is good for a chat and a cup of tea anytime.

Nominally once a week at a scheduled meetup. I'm reality, about once or twice a month.

These days I play disc golf with a customer-turned-friend every two or three weeks - which is way more often than before I met him. Back then, it was more like once or twice a year.

I guess I’m somewhat lucky that my job naturally puts me in contact with new people all the time. Even though I don’t hang out with friends that often, I still go into strangers’ homes almost daily to fix things, and I usually end up chatting with them. The elderly customers especially tend to offer me coffee - sometimes even food - which feels pretty wholesome. Almost like visiting grandparents.

tried to developed some friends in college, but its around the time when texting was a big thing, so it never went too far, because one can get obsessive over texting .

35 here. I have a couple friends I see weekly for board games, I rarely visit my other friends though, they're usually busy with their kids.

I left my home country, but I've been fortunate enough to get friends to visit a few times over the years. Would be nice to make some new friends but my kid honestly runs out my social battery all on his own.

In my early 30s. It was 2-3 times a week. A couple years ago it was basically every day because my friend group was also the polycule I was in and there were a lot of us. Currently it is back to basically every day because I'm going back to university and my new friend group are all students and I live in a student apartment so we see each other in and out of class.

Edit: actually it's been basically every day for years now. Somehow forgot I was living with my best friend during the transition from leaving the polycule to moving abroad for school.

Nearly every week for a session of snooker and on weekends pretty regularly. A lot rarer with old time friends who live further (1h+ drive). We've all got families. And yeah, one si ply has to take the time, it's healthy.

40s, most days each week. My wife and I schedule couch rotting days to recharge.

Edit: I hadn't read through many other responses before I commented. Not trying to flaunt or anything. I just wanted to let younger folks know that social life isn't necessarily doomed as you get older. We don't have kids (which makes it easier,) but many of our friends do. They just have to be deliberate about setting aside time for themselves which can be tough to do.

You mean when I'm not depressed, isolated and withdrawn?

I don't remember...

Turned 30 this year. I see my coworker friend almost every day. He’ll hang out with our other friends about once every month. I hang out with my wife every day. Our girlfriend comes over on the weekends. I see other friends online Friday and Saturday usually watching YouTube and drinking, but I hang out with that same friend group locally (we’re global, but a big concentration in this city) about once every two weeks? Big hang outs (7+) are about once a month. Huge hang outs (15+) about twice a year.

It helps being in a walkable, transit oriented city. We just walk to bars/breweries with people.

You mean at work?

Oh wait, am I supposed to actually see my non-work friends? I thought we just needed to text each other

40's. Once every 2 to 4 weeks, sometimes less. As an extrovert, this is killing (figuratively) me.

Are people over 40 allowed to reply? Or is that too large of an age gap?

Scheduled friend time. I have a lesbian friend who has never seen Madoka Magica so we do weekly watch parties. My childhood bestie hosts a weekly Twin Peaks watch party and we theorize together. I have a couple friends who my wife and I do D&D with. I also have an autist friend who I churn butter with since that shit is boring af alone.

I don't have any friends.

I've got 2 groups of 2 friends each that I keep in touch with every 2-3 months. Well, one friend lives about a 8 hour car ride away so I only see her actually about once a year. We always have to plan at least 2 weeks if not a month in advance for meet ups but we still all make the effort.

I think that's the hardest part is finding people who are worth the effort and are willing to make the effort in return. What I find works for my friends who are pretty different from each other is to find shared interests and do that. One group likes trying new places to eat and going shopping (a lot of times are H-Mart and Daiso). The other likes to watch movies and the review them together.

2-3 times per week in a normal week. Usually a scheduled dinner with neighborhood friends (and all our kids) midweek, and usually one or two social events on the weekend with whoever is scheduled. Plus I consider my work friends to be real friends, so I tend to see them almost every day.

What are these... "friends" you speak of?

Twice a year at most, if traveling coincides with the right locations.

40s. Have a group of friends that try to meet up twice a month to play Dungeons and Dragons. Then we have other friends we probably see every few months.

Like a drifter, I was born to walk alone.

Actually, a psychologist suggested it had more to do with my youth, but whatever. I don't drift much these days, there's too many snags, I just keep holding my head above water.

I’m 36 and don’t really consider myself to have friends. Working from home for years and just lot really “clicking” with people in my city keep me isolated but it’s alright. The few social functions I find myself obligated to attend kind of suck so I don’t feel I miss out on much.

Once every few months, mostly because i have to travel rather far to meet them and i only off one day a week. Locally i couldn't find any friend, and old friend drift apart very soon because i tend to drift away from everyone.

Same as I did post school as an adult. Once a week? Could be as little as once a month.

I walk to them all the time online though. At least a couple times a week.

Sometimes more often sometimes less, but on average 4-5 times a year.

I aim for weekly