Programmer Humor

git is like a minefield. stray away even a little bit from standard path and you are done for. I had git multiple times throw some obscure errors at me when trying some commands and then trying to undo/recover. how's "undo" is not a git command I don't understand.

in life you commit to many things. you commit to yourself, to your partner, to happiness, to legacy.

when we die, is that like a push to origin?

when we die, do our commits all go to the big repo in the sky?

is god the maintainer? when you pray is that like a bug report?

so many questions...

I remember when similar screenshots circulated for how to tell if i am running jdk or jre, which is even more surprising.

Keep your commits small. Merge often. That will reduce the likelihood of terrible merge conflicts.

If you’re not sharing your work with your team mates for a long time, then you’re setting yourself up for trouble.

No merges allowed. Rebase only.

See I wasn't really going to kill myself today, but the thought of dialing that long ass number is just to much.

“Proper way to commit after merge conflict” sounds like a robot trying to save a relationship after a bad sex experience

Google gives you results based on your prior search history.

git reset --hard <commit-hash>  
git push -f origin main  

i didn't see anything, officer

Holy fuck, that's a long phone number

calls suicide hotline to ask for tech support

So cool, I havent seen an ad like this in at least a decade. I use something called an ad blocker and also I switched to Kagi, so.... :)

It's never too late to git merge --abort!

Been there too OP. Not a good place.

It's usually easier to find another job, it will reset your mind, and fear won't be driving you.

Or you could just commit what you have, comment "YOLO" and auto resolve conflicts and push.

Jujutsu (which is compatible with git) has a nice conflict resolution flow that doesn't break you workflow.

Conflicts are encoded into the commits, so that there is never a weird in between state that you have to deal with immediately before being able to do anything else.
Then you can use Jujutsu's easier history manipulation to resolve the conflict in the conflicted commits.

https://steveklabnik.github.io/jujutsu-tutorial/branching-merging-and-conflicts/conflicts.html

And you could always jj undo if you did something you didn't want to.

git out --never-come-back

man \
git

If you git help, you could hash things out, rebase your commitments, and push forward to a better life. Then again I could just be cherry picking things.