Feels unreal. My friend spotted this at an airport.
This is a trap. They won't pay.
this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2025
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100% trap. As soon as someone self-reports, ICE will be over there kicking their doors in.
Time to "self"-report Republicans or MAGA heads...
I wonder how many burner phones one could automate to run down the list of Jan 6ers before the whole thing puckered back into whence it came?
Ooo, good idea.
Definitely a trap.
Take your picture and tell us about your relatives. We will absolutely not send this straight to ICE.
Definitions of submission (source: Wiktionary)
A submission is something that you give to somebody to be checked or accepted.
Submission is the act of accepting that somebody has power over you
I wonder which submission these fascists plan to follow-up on...
Do they offer this for citizens? I would love to leave this shithole forever if I could find someplace that didn’t mind American refugees.
I know we aren’t terribly loved in many places.
I'm sure that's in the roadmap. At some point it's going to be "Love it - or leave it!".
No way. They don’t want to miss out on the couple grand it costs to renounce your US citizenship
That's possible too.
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(2 replies)
If you’re actually serious, and if you fall into the LGBTQ+ umbrella, you may be able to come to Canada as a refugee.
I’m not sure if the USA qualifies yet, but I read they’re working on it. That may be in effect already, I’m not sure.
There's been I believe one trans person and one NB person so far who have claimed refugee status here..
Canada is lovely ❤️
You can tell I’m very Canadian because I read NB as New Brunswick and was very confused for a minute. Non-binary makes a lot more sense in context.
There are options, but you probably won't like them...
The darker your skincolor, the higher the fuckoff bonus. Money for Melanin (TM)
/s of course. For me, at least. Sigh.
Its for undocumented people right? How will they find out your identity if you dont give it to them?
Its for undocumented people right?
Surely there are a large number of 'sovereign citizens' out there who don't have any proof that they are US citizens?
You gotta start practicing your Spanish
~/s~
We pinky promise to follow through on being nice and not detaining/disappearing you.
"Ok, yes, tRUMP is known for not paying his bills but he will deffo pay you if you report yourself. Honest!!"
The clue is: "you may be eglible". Turn yourself in, and all you will get is a free flight if you are lucky. To somewhere.
the flight and the cash are not real. neither is the cake.
Me eating cake: I knew this was too good!
Jesus. Fucking. Christ.
- Force, defraud, and coerce people to sign up with your surveillance app
- Keep that $1k and fly them to concentration camps
- Comfortable USAns pat themselves on the back for helping undesirables
I'm a citizen but my partner and I departed for another country, how do I claim my free flight and $2000
Sounds like a good way to have the ICE goonsquad show up at your house at 3 am. God damn I hate this country
bruh I don’t want taxes used for this
What happens if a lot of natural born american citizens flood the system by reporting 'themselves'?
They get deported I'd assume.
Dude, I still kinda wanna
What about I fill it for ted cruz?
I guess that could be an alright deal if you somehow know you were being kicked out anyway
Everyone commenting that they wont pay or its all a trap isnt thinking about the optics and expense. Im not SAYING that they are wrong, or that the whole initiative ISNT evil (it is) but paying Ice agents, vehicles, camps, etc. All costs money (more than you would think) and makes you look like assholes (which they are). People deciding to pack up and leave on their own, withdrawing their savings selling their vehicles and leaving willingly on a plane costs less than the whole track down, round up, detain and deporting process and is considerably less bad for the optics.
My grandparents fled germany in the 30s back when being Jewish was becoming dangerous but they were still content for you to just GTFO. I wouldnt be surprised if it was legit... Still fucking wrong tho.
In that case, what's ICE planning on using their new, bigger-than-most-militarys' budget for? I'm not implying you're wrong, because you do make some good points, but I want to remind everyone of the obscene amount of money they have.
The vast majority who wont take them up on it.
If the per capita cost of deporting someone against their will is $10,000 and the cost of deporting someone consentually is $10,000 its still a win. Its just less work, every person who leaves voluntarily frees up the snatch teams to go after someone who doesnt.
It could be legit and a peaceful way to go but so far that's not how this administration has operated. So it still could be legit but what a massive risk that is to take.
Money really is not the issue here.
We see authoritarian and inhumane measures to "solve", often exacerbate, societal situations that could have been dealt with much more effectively for way less money.
Being cruel is a means to intimidate the broader population and the people behind it are willing to pay a big premium on it.
Now when I visit the US I only need to buy the inbound flight for me and my family. And I get $4000 spending money.
This will really boost tourism.
What are the odds they just use this to find people to arrest and throw in concentration camps?
8647/1
precisely
So not likely at all?
Scratch that, reverse it...
No, you had it right.
Weren't there reports of exactly this already happening?
Shit man, maybe I should have done that when I left the UK. I could have gotten them to fucking pay me on top of getting away from a shithole