I generally keep to this rule as an adult, for the most part. Yes, I have my phone since it doubles as my alarm, but if I'm looking at a "screen" in bed, it's an eReader with a warm light. I figure I sleep better that way, without all the blue light.
this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2025
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Imagine having the luxury of a private room lmao
Sounds stupid as fuck
@Gsus4 Well then where do you want them to masterbate while they watch porn?
I'm the living room, ofc. Shared family experiences for everyone
My kid is 3 but this has been a big issue on my mind lately. I’ve read The Anxious Generation, The Screentime Solution, and The Art of Screentime over the past 9 months (with some other tech-adjacent books). My husband has also recently had a turn-around on tech for kids. I think our big thing is no personal devices for the little one for a long time. Family computer in a common area. Family cellphone that can be used when she’s not with us. Family tv in the living room. Family iPad that is used for specific tasks.
I am having a really difficult time getting grandparents on board with this, it is infuriating.
I dont want them to be luddites but I dont want dependence until it is necessary for socialising and career etc.
I recommend reading this article if you’re worried about this https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2025/08/kids-smartphones-play-freedom/683742/
I definitely plan to allow as much freedom as developmentally appropriate as she gets older. As it is now I try to make sure she has time to play independently and with friends and I try to not intervene too much when she has minor issues. She has even asked for privacy or that she wants to be by herself and I always respect that within reasonable limits.
Great article, thx
The anxious generation sucks. The author's even admitted that the screens aren't at fault, it's adults banning kids playing outside. Then then get anxious and depressed and they use their phones as a substitution for what we banned
I did not enjoy the anxious generation book. There were a few small parts that I liked, but it’s why I started reading other books instead. My school district was all about the anxious generation and wanted us to read it. I did, but wanted a broader perspective.
I think this is where my family is landing.
Another rule: Don't let your kid share his face. Ever. For any reason.
If YouTube wants his face, just buy VPN so your kid can browse safely
Try reading this article, VPNs don't make you more private they just shift the trust model away from your ISP https://www.matyaskoszegi.com/post/vpns-your-privacy-savior-or-just-another-creepy-middleman
You're missing the point. If your location is outside of UK YouTube and others don't ask for age verification. Noo need to send your child pics to some creepy middle man
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VPNs as soon as they can tap a screen. Raise them with online pseudonyms they change annually. They don't learn their actual PII until they're at least 10. Can't give it out to strangers if you don't know it yourself!
I like and understand where you're going, but I can offer some actual experience. I learned my legal first name at 8.
It didn't go down well (I cried because the teacher didn't call my name and sent me to the school office to get it sorted) and I had a weird complex about the real name into high school. There's no rhyme or reason to the two names, so it is actually sort of surprising to pair the two. To this day I still go by the nickname I thought was my real name. My nieces and nephews still enjoy discovering my real name and calling me by it thinking it's a big secret they've discovered. I still have to explain it a hundred times a year to new coworkers and acquaintances.
I might be slightly facetious in my comment.
If I were to be slightly more earnest, I would say that the authoritarian concepts they learn from enforcement of arbitrary restrictions like "no screens in the bedroom" are far more harmful to their well-being than the information they could put on those screens.
The best "tech rule" I could give instill in them is an understanding of the concept of "click bait". The sooner I can immunize them to paywalls and microtransactions, the better.
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Beats whatever cumbersome recipe governments worldwide are trying to do to "keep kids safe"^TM^
"Phone goes in the locker before bed, Johnny."
"Johnny goes into the locker before bed, Phone."
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