edit: don't downvote me because i'm right and you're mad about it

there has never been a country in the history of imperialism that has been defeated by the people it subjugated. the system might be beaten back, hell, it might take on a new name and identity, but underneath the disguise it is still the same power hungry entity seeking wealth and will eventually be strong enough to strike back. regimes fall yet greed persists. fascist dictators are killed yet the elite press forward. but the people cannot give up. the people must fight against it all even in the face of complete and utter annihilation. it doesn't matter if the enemy has more weaponry or manpower than us--we don't let them take us without bleeding for it.

well, at least that's how i spent the last 21 years of life; holding on to that mentality because i knew it was right and i knew it was the only way to liberate people. when Trump was first elected it shattered me. i broke into a million pieces psychologically. i have since glued parts of myself back together but the reelection (it was actually stolen but w/e lol) has utterly destroyed me, and it isn't because Trump is winning or his army of sycophants are making the world a worse place:

it's the gaslighting and cowardice of the American people. people who i consider close friends have told me that i am "too much" lately, that i am too much of a "doomer," that everyone feels helpless so why hammer on about it. my friends and the people i respect are turning against me because i am pointing out the acts of the current administration. and you know what? they aren't outliers. everyone wants leftists to shut the fuck up about it. fascism is here, it has won, it's over. please shut the fuck up and let me exist in relative peace.

i get it. look at Russia, look at Indonesia. these countries are likely never going to overthrow the culture and rightwing ideology rampant and normalized in their society and they don't have militarized police like we do. there's truly nothing we can do other than protest, which.. lol.. that right is being severely restricted, so. good luck eventually, i guess. peace hasn't been an option for a long, long time but nobody is willing to accept that fact, so i don't see how this ends other than the people losing.

i'm done. i give up. i am not going to be the only one around me with any fucking sense. the painful reality is i am a goddamn coward like the rest of them and can't do shit either. but i don't act like that's okay. i don't fucking roll over and accept this shit and just shut up about it. but everyone wants me to, so.. alright. it isn't just my friends either it feels like the entire country.

everybody thinks this will eventually end. everybody is so certain life will stabilize and return to a level of normalcy. "we got through Bush, we can do this," i am told. they don't get it, they don't see it, and i am exhausted being the only fucking person who does. i'm done. i am plugging my ears and covering my eyes like everyone else.