this post was submitted on 08 Aug 2025
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LeopardsAteMyFace

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'I never thought leopards would eat MY face,' sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Eating People's Faces Party.

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On Tuesday morning, Immigration and Customs Enforcement announced in an internal email that it would offer cash bonuses to agents for deporting people quickly, an incentive meant to motivate the staff to speed up President Trump’s mass deportation campaign.

Less than four hours later, the agency abruptly canceled what was supposed to be a 30-day pilot program.

“PLEASE DISREGARD,” Liana J. Castano, an official in ICE’s field operations division, said in a follow-up email to agency offices around the country.

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They realized it's stupid to offer a cash bonus for something all those assholes will do gladly for free.

[–] resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world 16 points 5 months ago

Trump the deadbeat billionaire screws employees out of their wages. Again.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago
[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

And now they're shocked promises if bonus to be a brown shirt isn't getting good recruits...

No one fucking trusts trump, because he's constantly lying

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

No rug left unpulled

[–] dermanus@lemmy.ca 5 points 5 months ago

Geez, this is dictator 101 stuff. You have to pay your goons. If you fuck with their cash the whole thing falls apart.