"Everyone thinks they're the hero of their own story" - Handsome Jack
Generally the last episode of Tales from the Borderlands is fucking awesome when it comes to Handsome Jack quotes.
this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2025
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"GET OVER HERE!"
"Snake? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaake!"
A man chooses, and slave obeys.
When Picasso became bored of painting people, he started representing them as cubes and other abstract forms. The world called him a genius! I've spent my entire surgical career creating the same tired shapes, over and over again: the upturned nose, the cleft chin, the ample bosom. Wouldn't it be wonderful if I could do with a knife what that old spaniard did with a brush?
Goodbye, then. Be safe, friend. Don't you dare go Hollow.
GET UP ON THE HYDRA'S BACK
GET UP ON FHE HYDRA'S BACK!
Statement: I see you have purchased me, master. I find this a satisfactory arrangement. Am I to accompany you now? Shall I kill something for you?
HK-47 from Knights Of The Old Republic is probably my favorite source of quotes: https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Wookieepedia:Quote_of_the_Day/Archive/HK-47
- I was most proud to have partaken in the political system of the galaxy. During the time [the senator] possessed me, he gained significant rank. Given enough time, I believe he could have become chancellor. I even eliminated a few key opponents that he did not ask for. Freebies, if you will.
- Query: Would you rather be caught with contraband that is very illegal or just a little illegal?
- Droids tend to blend into the background, like a bench or a card table. Mockery: Droid, fetch this. Droid, translate that. Droid, clean out the trash compactor. Part of the love of my function comes when the ‘furnishings’ pull out tibanna-powered rifles and point them at the owners' heads.
- Observation: I am a droid, master, with programming. Even if I did not enjoy killing, I would have no choice. Thankfully, I enjoy it very much.
Go for the eyes Boo, go for the eyes!
"I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee"
Since so many other quotes are already claimed, how about some Outer Wilds:
Seriously, I tried everything I could think of [...], and neither idea worked.
"Damn, I look GOOD" Duke Nukem.
I'm sad the Hanar can't wear sweaters
Everything is going to be okay....
The game is Omori, this sentence really hits if you know the story.
I don't remember the exact line, but in Metal Gear Rising: Revengence they say something to the effect of "Just like the WMDs and Iraq!" Referring to how the US used a lie as a false pretext for invasion. It was just so straightforward and direct. Even today that would still be crazy, but that game has been out for a while. Pretty bold to put it in.
I recently replayed Metal Gear Rising, and when Armstrong kept talking about how much of a pussy America has become and started yelling that with him at the helm, he'd MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN, I was fucking shocked.
Granted, I know that term was an old Reagan term, but fuck, with Metal Gear Solid 2 (2001) being all about the internet flooding with misinformation and AI making it so that you don't truly know who you're talking with... And with Rising (2013) being about a dude thinking America is too woke and wanting to make it great again... AND WITH DEATH STRANDING (2019) being all about everyone being locked inside their homes, isolated with little physical connection to their friends and families, only waiting for the mailman to arrive with packages...
Whew, if I had to point out a person I suspect may have a functioning time machine, Kojima might be it..
These birds are Pissing me
off...I'm the original Starwalker
There's no shame in it, Raziel - revenge is motivation enough. At least it's honest. Hate me, but do it honestly.
I'll share some of my favourites from SMAC (1999), the undisputed, undefeated and overall best 4X game!
Pravin Lal:
- "As the Americans learned so painfully in Earth's final century, free flow of information is the only safeguard against tyranny. The once-chained people whose leaders at last lose their grip on information flow will soon burst with freedom and vitality, but the free nation gradually constricting its grip on public discourse has begun its rapid slide into despotism. Beware of he who would deny you access to information, for in his heart he dreams himself your master."
Sister Miriam:
- "The Morgans fear what may not be purchased, for a trader cannot comprehend a thing that is priceless."
- "Some would ask: 'how could a perfect God create a universe with so much that is evil?' They have missed a greater conundrum: why would a perfect God create a universe at all?"
- "The righteous need not cower before the drumbeat of human progress. Though the song of yesterday fades into the challenge of tomorrow, God still watches and judges us. Evil lurks in the datalinks as it lurked in the streets of yesterday. But it was never the streets that were evil."
Chairman Yang:
- "Learn to overcome the crass demands of flesh and bone, for they warp the matrix through which we perceive the world. Extend your awareness outward, beyond the self of body, to embrace the self of group and the self of humanity. The goals of the group and the greater race are transcendent, and to embrace them is to achieve enlightenment."
Lady Deirdre:
- "Eternity lies ahead of us, and behind. Have you drunk your fill?"
That game is such a gold mine.
- Once a man has changed the relationship between himself and his environment, he cannot return to the blissful ignorance he left. Motion, of necessity, involves a change in perspective.
- Technological advance is an inherently iterative process. One does not simply take sand from the beach and produce a Dataprobe. We use crude tools to fashion better tools, and then our better tools to fashion more precise tools, and so on. Each minor refinement is a step in the process, and all of the steps must be taken.
- Einstein would turn over in his grave. Not only does God play dice, the dice are loaded.
A particular one always gives me chills:
- I sit in my cubicle, here on the motherworld. When I die, they will put my body in a box and dispose of it in the cold ground. And in the million ages to come, I will never breathe, or laugh, or twitch again. So won't you run and play with me here among the teeming mass of humanity? The universe has spared us this moment.
"The Unbound will never be slaves again."
"Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls and ask the ghosts if honor matters. The silence is your answer."
Honourable mention: "I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee."
" " - Half-Life 2
From the game Plague’s Tale Requiem, the Smuggler, Sophia, speaking to Hugo, a child, who is worried about being bit by an animal he’d like to pet. “Just say to yourself it can happen and that's all!”
From Homeworld: "No one is left. Everything's gone. Kharak is burning."
Hello, my name is Dr. Glenn Pierce, and by now you may have realized that all of this has happened exactly the way it was supposed to. You see, everyone who comes to the institute does so because they feel they are no longer in control of something important to them. But, more often than not, the problem is not that the problems we face can't be solved; the problem is that we become so afraid of failure that we refuse to see our problems from a new perspective -- and so we do the same things again, and again, and again. And therein of course, we find exactly the failure we were looking for.
Your life will always be a struggle, and you will always have problems. But today, you had the chance to see things differently. Even though it meant facing obstacles that seemed impossible at first, you thought outside the box - and you overcame them. Because you saw things from every angle, you understood them for what they really were. Because you kept moving forward, no matter how far off the path you were told you were headed, or how unexpected it became...you found your way.
In a few minutes, you'll be back in the real world, and some part of you will say that none of this was real: So how could it have meant anything? But -- just like the power of perspective itself -- it will have been as real as you believed it to be. All you've got to do is... wake... up.
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"A toaster is just a death ray with a smaller power supply! As soon as I figure out how to tap into the main reactors, I will burn the world!" Toaster, Fallout New Vegas (Old World Blues)
“If you can hear the police knock on your door, the music isn’t loud enough” -Guitar Hero
"But i gave my cat to you. Doesnt that make you the owner?"
Its said by a ghost cat to a cat. The owner in the context is the reason why the alive cat is locked in a series of rooms. I have spent months trying to understand what it means and still cant