Relationship Advice

Okay, so first of all, if the two of you aren't in physical proximity, the odds of having any kind of real relationship are vanishingly small. So I would recommend writing off this whole "relationship" from the get-go.

Second, while compliments and comments in the moment may feel nice, the emotional rollercoaster doesn't feel nice. It is good that you recognize this. Now you need to get off the rollercoaster.

Third, a lot of people are talking about what her intentions might be. My policy is to be honest and to generally assume honesty. She says she is complimenting you to help boost your self esteem. This is very nice of her, and you should appreciate her kindness, even if it is misguided.

Forth, the important part - action. Tell her that you appreciate that she is trying to boost your mood, but that you've found that the emotional rollercoaster it puts you on makes you feel worse overall. Ask her to stop. If she doesn't stop, tell her firmly "I've asked you to stop doing this. Please stop now or I will stop talking to you." If she continues, stop talking to her. If this is a problem within your group of friends, reach out to friends individually and explain the situation from your perspective, and ask for their understanding as you maintain your personal boundaries.

This should solve your immediate problem. However, you have a bigger problem. Why are you even hung up on this girl at all? She doesn't live near you. You don't seem to know what she looks like. She is violating your boundaries and making you feel bad. Why do you give a single flying fuck about her? Well, the answer is obvious to everyone here - she is the only woman in your life who has shown you any kind of romantic interest lately. You have no options, so even a bad option is enough for you to get all emotionally tangled up. And the solution to this problem is equally obvious: go find more options. It's like you're asking us if it's safe to eat the moldy bread in your cabinet because you forgot grocery stores exist. There are 4 billion other women on the planet - go talk to one who isn't on the internet!

Draw your boundaries.

The best thing is probably to be honest about your confusion and tell her about it. If you don't want her to say these things just to boost your ego, say it. If she goes on after that, well maybe she is interested after all.

It's weird that she won't give you a direct answer. Brushing off a direct question and then continuing with the previous behavior is troubling. Don't send her any money or gifts. You say she wants to get to know you more but you shouldn't answer any questions she has that could be used to defeat a security question challenge.

Not saying that it is the case here, but if a girl online is asking everything about a guy, but is vague about herself, sometimes they're trying to scam the guy into giving gifts or money. So, be careful.

In the game, do you give her things?

She seems like she is trying to lead you along so you keep fulfilling a need she has but isn't genuinely interested in you or you getting to know her.

There are a lot of other possibilities, but a lot more specific information would be needed to make a judgement call on her motivations.

My two cents: imbalance is a red flag.

Her being interested in you is not weird, being cagey about herself is. If you want to, explore topics she is willing to talk about and build from there. Otherwise, keep at arm’s length and see where it goes.

Fake : Anon has a girlfriend.

Gay : She's a man and has a crush on you.

Go clean with her. It's better than trying to guess what she's after with strangers on the internet.

Healthy relationships, even friendship ones are based on good communication.

Setting boundaries too.

She's absolutely getting something out of it, probably enjoying the feeling of being able to induce a reaction. I think "boosting your ego" has much less to do with it than her own ego.

She's a man

Yeh, straight up ask her about it.
You appreciate her boosting your ego, but it is coming across as flirting.
Is she flirting?

If she says yes, ask her where she thinks it's going, what you should do next.
Like, "oh, cool. I'm into that. So ... What now?". Then have fun, and see where it goes

If she says no, then say it will take some time to re-adjust to her being just a friend, and ask her to set boundaries if things feel like they go too far.
Like "oh ok, I wasn't sure. It's kinda lead me down that path, but I like playing games with you. So, if I'm ever inappropriate, call me out. But I'll try to keep everything platonic".
Then... Just be normal. Don't be confused. If you overstep then she will say.
Have fun, and enjoy a new friend.

Do you do anything outside of the game? Like chat casually, video call, have movie nights?

If you are interested in her, my advice would be to try and grow it outside of the game itself.

👌 👈