Crustaceans: Extinct
Mammals: Extinct
Plants: Extinct
Amphibians & Reptiles: Extinct
Birds: Extinct
Fungi: Interstellar hive-mind
this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2025
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Plants keep evolving and devolving into trees every 100 generations.
There's a phenomenal documentary series called The Future Is Wild that speculates on this question.
https://youtube.com/@thefutureiswildofficial
https://www.thefutureiswild.com/
It has 3 parts, projecting to 5, 100 and 200 million years into the future.
The main theme is that niches determine attributes. So when an opportunity opens up, one species will evolve to fill that niche. For instance sea birds evolve into whales. Octopodes evolve in primates.
I loved this as kid. It was one of a handful of really influential pieces of media from my childhood.
I'm actually surprised octopus haven't evolved more than they already have. I suppose they would have to evolve skeletons to be able to survive on land so that's probably what's holding them back.
Raccoon also seems to be a pretty popular mammal convergance. Or generally small climbing quadruped with a varied diet and at least semi-functional hands.
Crustaceans: Crab
Mammals: ~~Weasel~~ Crab
Plants: ~~Tree~~ Grass. Everything grass.
Amphibians & Reptiles: ~~Unchanged because they are perfect~~ Crab
Birds: ~~360° around back to dinosaurs~~ First of all, avian dinosaurs are dinosaurs. Secondly, 360° doesn't really make sense, probably they meant 180°. Finally, crab.
Fungi: I shan't speculate on the affairs of gods.
Moral of the story: You might not like it but decapods are peak animal evolution. All roads lead to crab.
Secondly, 360° doesn't really make sense, probably they meant 180°.
It makes sense if you consider birds to be a mid-360° position of dinosaur evolution. They started at "classic" dinosaurs, pivoted to the avian variety, and will continue to pivot until they return to their classic form.
Plant evolution is anything but stable. They keep evolving and devolving from weeds to trees and back every few 100 generations.
Plants? Crabgrass.
Hotel? Trivago.
^ Winner of the thread.
360° makes sense if the starting point was dinosaurs. Birds would be the 180° mark.
Ring the crab bell
Mammals: Anteater
Ants: Crab
Mammals: Crabeater
Misusing 360° where you should use 180° is a running joke
Ah good point. I'm more used to people doing it unintentionally.
I don't mind being a crab imagine not working. Just be crab.
One fungus will eventually manage to mind control the crabs, like some already do with ants.
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Even grass evolves to tree - look at bamboo
Or palms.
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Even the gods fear the fungal network.
360° "back" around to dinosaurs confirms that birds are still just dinosaurs
Edit:
I dont think they can go 360 maybe 270 those wings are a fundamental change
I mean we have flightless birds already, their vestigial wings could turn prehensile again eventually
Flying dinosaurs. So basically dragons.
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Sharks: Sharks.
Fungus head out to seed another planet.
WAAAGH!
Anteaters are more likely than weasels
wow this is fascinating, thanks for sharing!
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"shan't" is a great word
Beatles. Beatles everywhere. Bowl cuts will go crazy.
Everything in the system evolves into a cloud of dust and gas about 27 million years from now.
That's... that's very soon. What do you know‽
Evolution by Stephen Baxter (Wikipedia) was an interesting read.
Note: Baxter can be dry at times but i always enjoy the worlds he creates.
I respect the hell out of Baxter, he's a hard sci-fi artist. However, he's so unrelentingly bleak I had to quit reading his stuff.
Can you share where you felt that way? Been a while since I've read him.
The midpoint to the end of Evolution, humans basically devolve and ultimately go extinct.
It's been awhile since I've read anything by him as well.
I remember another book where artifically created people inside a dwarf star were dying due to solar harvesting, IIRC. I remember it being depressing but fascinating. Don't remember how it ends.
Yeah, very fair. I guess i quite like the bleakness. I love dark and gritty stories.
He's an incredible author, I'd put him up there with Alastair Reynolds. I just can't handle it.
Everything becomes crab on long enough timeline, Daniel-san. Be the lobster! Shell on. Shell off. Sift the floor.
I had a dream a couple weeks ago where I was reading some news about penguins developing a language to talk to each other. And in the dream I was wondering if we as humans were in any way hindering the penguins' capacity to evolve into a sentient species - then realized they were already so close to us. They have arms and legs, can use tools, talk with a structured language and everything - what kept them being labeled as plain animals if they did all that?
In the afternoon I suddenly remembered the dream and for a split second was kinda agreeing with my dream's argument, until I realized the penguins in the dream were closer to Animal Crossing characters than to actually penguins.
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