Farting while pissing is awesome.
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Brother you've got my upvote
why not all 3, pooping farting and pissing.
Just not as satisfying, especially while standing.
Now add rows and columns for:
- cumming
- vomiting
- bleeding
- menstruating
- dying
No, add these as new dimensions and make it a matrix so we can have pissing while shitting while cumming while dying
The hypercube of gross.
And sneezing. Have you ever sneeze-sharted? Worst feeling ever
sheezing
Shitting while pissing is ok, as long as you're sitting pissing
I imagine it would take a great deal of both mental and physical fortitude in order to curl one out whilst standing tall.
Soon or later this will be you:
Now we can all laugh about it. So we can long after. But in that moment? You will learn what pure dread feels like.
God I hope someone reads your comment, laughs and accidentally shits and lives the very moment you are describing. Just staring at the face they are now making.
Happened on my 30th birthday, after all the festivities. Felt appropriate
I love that someone took time out of their day to carefully plan and prepare this chart.
According to this, always be shitting and you'll never have a bad time.
A-B-S. A-always, B-be, S-shitting. Always be shitting! Always be shitting!! A-I-D-A. Attention, interest, decision, action. Attention -- do I have your attention? Interest -- are you interested? I know you are because it's shit or walk. You shit or you hit the bricks! Decision -- have you made your decision for Christ?!! And action. A-I-D-A; get out there!! You got the turtlehead comin' out; you think they came out to take a look around? Guy doesn't sit on the toilet unless he wants to shit. Sitting there waiting to deliver the goods! Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? (to Moss) What's the problem pal?
pissing while pissing
My version of this would have the smiley face in every square.
It's good to be alive!
it's all smiles so long as you're sitting on the toilet, anything involving shitting is never smiles if you're not on the toilet
Excellent point!
Farting while pissing is cool though
you can see the autistic vibrations in the pee stream
the autism leaving my body as i take a piss
don't forget to keep your autism hydrated and drink the piss
This chick loooves pissing
The real terror begins when vomiting enters the chat.
I was sick when I was like 9 while sitting on the toilet. The sink was too far away, there was no trash can in sight, and the toilet was in use by my ass. I threw up half digested Chef Boyardee ravioli on the floor. Mfw -> :(
Why is pissing while pissing more happy than shitting while shitting or farting while farting.
Wait... I get it now.
Sitting to pee instantly solves half of these
This chart is for sitting to pee.
Then I don't see the problem in shitting during peeing.
The problem is your bathroom timeline just changed. That's a face of consternation because a 1 minute excursion has turned into at least 5 minutes.
Oh, I see. I read my saved articles in the bathroom so it takes me around 184 minutes regardless of what my initial purpose was anyway.
Quality shitpost
I once did a piss, fart and sneeze at the same time. Got sort of like a really pleasant shiver.
Your body took a screenshot
Wait until you get food poisoning 🫠 hopefully you have a tub beside your toilet.
Oh man, I used to get gastroenteritis every few weeks before I found out what was causing it.
Gastro was horrible. When the astonishingly painful cramps hit you you didn't know which way the 'projectiles' were evacuating from until the very last second.
Unfortunately the toilet in my house at that time was in a separate room as the sink and bath. Which meant if I needed to throw up I'd either have to do it in the horrible diarrhea covered toilet or just throw up on the floor.
Decisions decisions.
On the really bad episodes I would just sit in the bath for hours on end so I could turn the shower on to wash the puke and/or shit away.
Fortunately I haven't had an episode in twenty years now.
I can fix her