The Onion and other satire w/ layers

A new rating scale, launched this week, will allow Western governments to more clearly express which meaningless platitude they are using about the situation in Gaza today.

Advocates say the new system will help reduce confusion about exactly what empty statement is being expressed, while Governments continue to do nothing. “I had a situation last week where I thought my government was Profoundly Troubled by the slaughter of civilians in Gaza, but it turns out they were only Deeply Dismayed. This new system will make things a lot clearer and avoid any confusion,” Australian Jess Koh said. [...]