this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2025
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Veganism

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Just the title but here's what prompted me to ask:

My mom is coming to visit and even tho I've made it clear I don't like non-vegan products in my house she pushes for me to let her have at least milk for her coffee. Last time she came with my brother they got something with meat delivered because I was in bed puking my guts out. When talking soon after me going vegan she said her pregnancy state felt super good so surely the cows aren't suffering that much... etc...

So I've thought of a great way to fight that back non-confrontationally and helping her understand: in order to bring a product in she has to watch a video with me. I'm hoping to watch a whole documentary during her visit but I think shorter videos would be more feasible.

Speaking of, I have never watched a whole documentary or in a very long time, didn't need them, if you had to choose one which would you choose?

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[–] streetfestival@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I don't have any videos to recommend, I'm sorry. But I empathize with the frustration of having non-vegan family members bring non-vegan things into your space. I might approach things differently. Maybe buy a couple non-dairy creamers that you think your mom might like and lightheartedly encourage her to taste test them. Try to have some fun with it. I think that achieves several goals like reducing confrontation and her gaining experience at trying dairy alternatives :D. Thanks for posting. I don't know if any of that was helpful ( - hopefully :/ - ) but it was nice to connect :)

[–] veggay@kbin.earth 2 points 1 week ago

@streetfestival@lemmy.ca back then I used to get this milk from Silk that's the plant milk most similar to dairy milk I've ever tried, I told her about it. Before even trying it she insisted on getting her milk when we were at the super market. She tried it but prefers her milk. She tries food, she goes in already thinking she won't like it a lot of the times so it's not great but she does try them and then says she prefers the animal version. I need a different approach, which is why I'll try this.

[–] krathalan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This video got me about a year ago. Nothing super graphic, not at a slaughterhouse, not even any abuse. But the "simple" act of taking a newborn child away from their mother completely shattered any remaining dissonance I had about going vegan, personally.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL9QJEm_SJY

I will echo the other commenters suggestion to get some vegan creamers. Honestly, it may be worth considering cutting them off if they can't follow your rules in your own residence. There's plenty of food to eat that isn't meat (obviously); there's no excuse for them having meat delivered. If they can't go one week (not sure how long they're staying) without meat/dairy in your house, then they honestly don't care about your feelings.

I would ask them what foods they would prefer -- give them options like tofu, different beans, lentils, edamame, etc. Maybe make a soup with their chosen legume.

I would encourage you to compromise and """allow""" them to eat non vegan if you go to a restaurant. I understand this is really distressing, but with some people it can be helpful to focus on one goal at a time (e.g. no animal products in your residence).

[–] veggay@kbin.earth 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

@krathalan@lemmy.blahaj.zone thank you for the video, I think this will help and is very much like what I'm looking for!

But the rest of your comment is uncalled for tbh. I think it's wild to tell a stranger to cut their mom off because she drinks milk in her house when visiting once every many years. I appreciate that you want to help but I wasn't inviting advice on how to deal with my mother, nobody here has any clue on the dynamics of our relationship and what she has done for me, this thread is about videos.

[–] krathalan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overstep. I didn't think you should cut her off because she drinks milk, but because from the way I read your initial comment it seemed they had brought meat into your house after it was clear you had established a no meat rule, as part of a larger pattern of disregarding your boundaries -- perhaps a projection of my own experiences.

I hope you and your mom have a good time together when she comes.

[–] veggay@kbin.earth 2 points 1 week ago

Thank you, no worries, all good. She did brought meat into my house without thinking much about it despite me having asked them to please don't do that, their logic was that I wasn't going to be in the room with them; but she also goes way out of her way to buy me a lot of vegan food before I even land when I go visit, she makes sure there's always appropriate food available for me, she willingly goes to vegan restaurants to make me happy even tho a couple we have gone to in the past have been terrible, and does/has done many many other things for me. She is not perfect but she tries, I owe to that woman everything that I have and am today, and I'm personally tired on how quick the internet is to tell strangers to cut off their family members without knowing anything about them but one paragraph.

[–] veggay@kbin.earth 2 points 1 week ago

My go-to video is Dairy is Scary, 5 mins long

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UcN7SGGoCNI