depression_now!

I'm an American. This country is a dumpster fire. Finding out the world is worse than your assumptions is part of growing up.

Stop going to Reddit. That place is terrible and full of bots.

Also what is American culture to you?

American "media," anything you might consume to learn what America "is" is pretty much pure propaganda. We really aren't anything to be admired or envied.

I share a similar feeling to you, being born in America and subjected to the brainwashing that happens in our schools that tells you we're 100% The Best People On Earth™©® and that we were always on the right side of history, only to grow up and find out that's a complete lie and we're often among the absolute worse humanity has to offer really messed with my head.

What America "is" is a collection of small, selfish groups (families) with very little interest in the well-being of people "different" from themselves, or different from their families, and all deeply disconnected from the realities of the wider world. Outside of that, we're a people ruled by the wealthiest in the world who are actively working to ruin anything Americans could possibly have any pride in having created in favor of increasing their individual wealth.

Individual Americans can be good people, but as a whole, this place is a dumpster fire masquerading as a paradise.

Reddit isn’t representative of America. I don’t think any one forum or social media is representative of the country really. America is a big country with people of pretty much any opinion on anything.

I’m not sure what American media you’ve consumed nor what picture you have of the country, but it’s likely propaganda. You won’t be able to fly in and expect wherever you land to be what you envisioned. You could with a bit of research find a place that has people who agree with you and will welcome you.

I live in New York (the state, not the city) and much of the place prides itself on being welcoming to foreigners and immigrants of all types. Every job I’ve had was with foreign coworkers and I’ve always enjoyed talking to them and learning about their experiences and perspectives. That said it’s not sunshine and rainbows here right now, especially for foreigners.

The country is in a crisis of inequality and it’s hard to get by in most places and New York is no different. Unless you have good money and good qualifications, you can expect to have to work two jobs here and you’ll still struggle with money whether you’re a foreigner or not. The US government is currently hostile to the plights of those struggling and so no relief seems to be coming soon. This stress has then also been turned against foreigners and immigrants by powerful people.

I don’t know very much about the rest of the country’s treatment of foreigners since I’m an American already and travel is expensive. Still if you’re willing to deal with the struggle, you could likely find a home and friends in New York regardless of what your own beliefs and opinions are. That said, you should wait a few years for this country’s xenophobia to stop being so militarized.

Another American here - there are definitely good and bad sides, but one of the major bad sides are the kind of people you interacted with. There are plenty of them here, and they don’t want you here and will tell you as much. Idk where you’re from, but if you’re the least bit foreign looking, you will be rejected outright, sometimes even heckled, just for being foreign. I want to stress that not all people, or places, in the US are like this, but if you can’t handle the rejection online, then it will probably be harder if you experience it in person. It sounds like you idealized the US like a long-distance relationship - romanticizing all the good things while not being able to see the bad things, until you got slapped in the face with them.

I don’t know what advice to give you, since you say you can’t connect with another country the same but you also have a distrust of Americans now. I honestly wouldn’t suggest anyone immigrate here right now since our immigrants are being thrown in jail for no reason. Maybe try Canada? They’re supposedly nicer up there, and still close to the US if you want to visit.

The US is about to enter a second great depression, people are very unhappy in the US and most are heavy into denial about it. I think you have to apply this context to understand the behavior of people from the US right now.

Toxic people in the US are lashing out more and more as their lives and loved ones' lives deteriorate because an honest conversation is too scary for us to have about our future.

american here also struggling with depression.

this has nothing to do with america. America did not reject you, a few assholes on the internet did. this happens to literally everyone; for whatever reason people are emboldened to say hurtful things on the internet that they never would say in-person.

(granted there are of course real, hateful bigots in america but i think on the whole it is still a welcoming place for immigrants)

you have to learn to not take social media too seriously, and if you can’t do that, just avoid it. you will feel mentally healthier without it.

Our political situation right now is maddening, divisive, and destructive, but this too shall pass. The pendulum will swing back

All the outrage that makes headlines, all the hatred are generally not part of day to day life. Generally it’s online, social media posting for the outrage and lack of consequences. Social media is a cancer on modern life, better ignored for you health.

That being said, people like to criticize the us. Some of it is deserved but much is not. Sometimes we’re the target just by being the biggest and easiest. Sometimes it’s for the clicks.

Using myself as an example

• I believe I’m generally kind, helpful, empathetic, honest. I try to be a good role model for my kids.
• I am very much against the current political regime and its abuses, and say so online. If you don’t want that, don’t look in the relevant communities
• however, I do believe it is the duty of every citizen to be self-critical of their town, state, country. How can you hope to improve or do your best without an honest look at where you need improvement? Of course it’s important to be constructive, otherwise it’s just complaining.
• The us has always had strong ideals and a mixed bag of living up to them. People here are dismissing them as propaganda but we should think of them as goals

If you came to America, or most/ all countries, you'd see that most people whatever the country, are basically good and kind.

Could you be neurodivergent? Just asking because I see some things there I went through and I didn't understand why. Now I know.