Mental Health

Being told my disability doesn't even exist. Or can easily be cured with some random-ass supplements.

I have an invisible disability. Half of my problems are people assuming I can do the things I can't.
The other half are those same people trying to help me with the things I excel at while being much worse than me at those things and thinking they're helping.

If you want to know how to help a disabled person, just ask them. They usually understand their own disability pretty well.

I ride a bike and fast so I am not physically disabled. I don't look disabled. I have full mobility. I can mask a lot of the pain for short appearances. No one knows the years with a lack of sleep; how fast I fall apart when sitting up or standing; the countless times I've gone days not able to do anything because I carried a grocery bag or reached for a dish; the sharp pain that lasts for weeks if I turn my head left; what real pain is like when it is a constant noise that never fades; when the volume of the white noise of pain is so loud it is all you can hear, when even your internal thoughts fade; constantly feeling a need to consciously try to relax the tension over my entire body that builds in clinching muscles and grinding teeth; to wake up every day feeling exhausted; to watch everyone around me progress in life while in limbo unable to move on; the days and years fading together; the fear of a terrible helpless future both within and without; the indignity; helplessness; vanity of life and purpose; forever morning one's own loss through the torment of prolonged time; profound loneliness countered by embarrassing moments when isolation leads to acting unlike one's true self; the haunting regrets; the unfounded accusations of a mental cause and not a symptom; the lack of competent medical professionals that figure out hard problems without excuses. There are so so many things

I’ve been denied promotions and high value projects after disclosing to my boss I have anxiety.

I’ve never disclosed it since.

Now I just need a personal day or am sick, and no I won’t elaborate.

Tough one. I don't have any lived experiences of disability so I'm relying on those that do and I'm happy to learn, but... is it not better than than assuming that they can?

I can understand that it would be mega fuckin frustrating for people to chime in and offer help even if it's coming from a good place, but it seems to me that society has come a long way towards helping people by default rather than just letting people struggle and expect to have to ask for support.

I suppose with no understanding of the depth and extent of a disability - coupled with the notion that not all disabilities are visible - means that it's impossible to tell if someone needs support or otherwise. I suppose I would always err on the side of caution and ask someone if they need help - not because I want to intrude, but I'd want to make sure everyone gets the opportunity to do whatever they're trying to do.