Microblog Memes

I do a guac because it's easy and I'm not great at cooking. Fortunately guac hasn't hit the zeitgeist in Japan so people are impressed by it.

Mozzarella stuffed meatballs

Probably asian stir fry noodles. Easy to make a large batch. The hardest part is preparing and cooking the chicken. The rest is just dumping everything into a wok and mixing it.

I’ve never taken food to a potluck before, but it would probably be spaghetti.

Lemon pound cake with lemon drizzle.

Pepperoni bread. The secret is I use cooper sharp cheese, as well as a mix of fun spices including some za'tar and Italian sausage seasoning in the oil it bakes in.

• Pulled pork
• Deviled eggs
• Mashed potatoes (not just potatoes and salt)

E: markdown

Rolo pretzel turtles for me.

Lay out some mini pretzel twists on a baking sheet with parchment paper and top each with a Rolo candy.

Put in a low oven for maybe 6-10 minutes, until the Rolos are soft but not melted.

Then quickly press a pecan on top of each one right when they come out, then let cool.

I've also done it with animal crackers and almonds.

Where's my people at with plates, cups etc. because they can't cook?

Smoked deviled eggs: throw peeled hard-boiled eggs on the grill or smoker for an hour or so on low indirect heat. The filling is similar to regular deviled eggs, but you swap yellow mustard with Dijon, relish with diced jalapenos, and mix in a couple teaspoons of BBQ rub. Garnish with a jalapeno slice. The last couple times I made them for a potluck I didn't get to have any because they were already gone by the time I made it to that point in the line.

For dips, I won a dip competition at work with this jalapeno ranch recipe.

I have 3, and I'm expected to bring them all, lol.

Appetizer: Incredibly unhealthy chili-cheese dip.

This one is just mixing other products for the most part. I brown some breakfast sausage, then mix it with 1 small jar of Tostino's queso, one can of chili, a drained can of rotel, and mix in a bunch of cumin and add cayanne paper to spice tolerance. Nuke it and stor a few times. Great on chips and makes ludicrous chili dogs.

Entree: pork tenderloin. It's always a huge hit, and it's embarrassingly easy:

Cover it in Soy Sauce and Grill Mates Montreal Steak Seasoning, cook at 350 for 45 minutes, and (this is key) LET IT SIT for 10 minutes before cutting it. Also cut to serve instead of pre-slicing. Those last 2 bits are the "secret" that keeps it from being dry.

Desert: Sopapilla cheesecake. It's basically concentrated diabetes

Layer bottom of 9x13 glass pan with a dough sheet (crescent rolls pinched together also works), mix 3 8oz packages of cream cheese, 1.5 cups of sugar, and a teaspoon of vanilla together and pour over the dough. Polut another dough sheet on top and melt a stick of butter and pour over the top. Mix a teaspoon of cinnamon with another 1/2 cup of sugar and sprinkle over the melted butter. Bake at 350 for an hour then let harden in fridge overnight to set. I like to heat it up a bit in the oven to soften and re-melt to serve.

Chicken parm, or its fried wings with homemade sauces.

The parm is literally just, crack two eggs. Take two chicken breasts or whatever and cut them in half or into strips.

Take a bowl of plain, yes plain panko bread crumbs. Take shredded parmesan like the shit you find in the green shaker bottles you keep in the fridge. Shredded oregano, Mixed Italian seasoning, any other separate Italian seasonings you want. Also could add some red pepper flakes for a small kick.

Skin:

1 - 2 cups of panko

1 - 1/12 cup of parmesan

1 tbsp of Oregano and other seasonings mixed

Crack 2 eggs in a bowl. Mix some garlic salt in to strengthen the flavor.

Set aside a bowl of plain flower

Dredge chicken in flower, dredge in eggs, dredge in flower than eggs again

Coat in Panko throughly

Refrigerate for at least an hour or more

Either deep fry until the internal temperature is 165 (Be careful with heat distribution in oil. Too hot will rip skin off)

Or Air fryer style

Depending on your Air Fryer 350 - 375 degrees Adjust time accordingly, flip chicken in the middle of cooking and coat with marinara or desired sauce.

Serve with noodles, boom. Donezo, and it's delicious.

Also if any other would be chef's have ways to improve that be my guest :)

I was Broccoli Salad.

My sister was deviled eggs.

Spicy red lentil dip. I just make a dal with less water lol.

Cups and plates

Bacon brussels sprouts. Cut one pack of bacon into lardons, cook bacon, remove the bacon, pour out just a little bacon grease but leave some in the pan, add trimmed and halved/quartered brussels sprouts with some salt, pepper, maybe a little garlic powder, cook until al dente-ish, add the bacon back, mix, serve or transfer to crockpot.

Edit: Finish with a little squirt of lemon juice and grated parm.

What is it with all the dips in USA cuisine? And what are you dipping that need such heavy dipping sauces?

My family's would probably be "Damn Good Dip," which is very easy to make: take a container of sour cream and mix a packet of onion soup-mix into it. Serve with potato chips.

For standard dinner faire, my parents make Consomme Rice, which is just white rice cooked using beef consomme instead of water.

My recipe would be Fried Deviled Eggs, which is just deviled eggs but before you put the yolk back in, you batter the whites with panko and throw them in the air fryer until they get crispy and crunchy. It's an extra step in an already less than easy to prepare food, but I've gotten lots of people asking if I'm going to make them when I go to parties.

I'm also known for my Steakhouse-style Garlic Mashed Potatoes, which, like with the rice, the trick is to boil the garlic and potatoes both in chicken stock instead of water, and then mash the garlic cloves right into the potatoes along with butter and cream cheese. It makes them super flavorful.

BBQ Ribs (in the oven)

Ingredients: 1 rack St Louis style ribs 2 tbsp butter Rib dry rub (most anything will do, but sweet or mesquite works best) Sweet BBQ sauce (Sweet Baby Rays)

Steps: Preheat oven to 275 Rinse ribs in sink, pat dry and cut into 2 equal halves. Apply dry rub liberally, but shake off excess dry rub. Wrap in tin foil and place 1 tbsp butter directly on ribs. Bake at 275 for 3 hours. Remove ribs from oven and remove tin foil. Slather ribs in bbq sauce. Broil in oven for 90 seconds a side. Cut each rib into individual servings.

You’ll always leave the party with an empty dish.

S'mores as a tray bake. I get to blowtorch the marshmallow tops!