this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 179 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Maybe remove the dead guy from the wall.

[–] gdog05@lemmy.world 70 points 2 months ago

Yes, it's obviously the ancient death cult symbol that stifles humanity and individuality that would make that room feel claustrophobic.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You have to let him into your heart or he's going to torture you for all eternity.

[–] Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 26 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Only thing in my heart is excess cholesterol.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 7 points 2 months ago

Don't inject tren directly into your heart then, nerd

[–] LordWiggle@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

No he's not, he's lazy AF. All he did was sacrifice his weekend for all of humanity. Do you really think he's going to haunt anyone, when that's all he could spare for humankind?

[–] Takapapatapaka@lemmy.world 37 points 2 months ago (3 children)

This stool clearly has too many legs. It's way more fun with only 2!

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 14 points 2 months ago

I only have 2 legs and I'm doing fine

[–] Zombiepirate@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You can't sit for long on a stool with only two legs; I think it just becomes a stool sample at that point.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Unless you flip it over, then it doubles the seating capacity AND makes it more stable.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 27 points 2 months ago (4 children)

The cross. Religious mythology is not useful to society.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (7 children)

How would we get to Heaven without religion?

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 21 points 2 months ago

F-18 Hornets.

[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 months ago

There's a stairway you can buy. Pretty simple really

[–] sylver_dragon@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, they will accept you for your virtue. If the gods are unjust, then they weren't worth worshiping anyway. And if there are no gods, then at least you lived a good life to be remembered by .

[–] fnrir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 months ago

1 - Your question presupposes abrahamic faith.

How will we achieve moksha without Hinduism?

How will we achieve nirvana without Buddhism?

2 - dependency on is due to our fear of death / the unknown combining with religion

We don't know what and if anything happens after death because it is untestable by us for obvious reasons, but some religions still postulate an answer for reasons.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Be a good person? I don't need religion to live a productive life.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

I agree, I was just wondering how to get to Heaven, but others have pointed out F-18s, a new Tower of Babel, etc...so I think we're set.

[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If we remake the tower of babel with modern construction techniques I don't think god could destroy it as easily.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Fair. And maybe you could put the F-18 runway at the top.

[–] snugglesthefalse@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

The first step is dying I think

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 months ago

Mythology isn't a problem. The issue is convincing huge swaths of a population to believe mythology is true.

[–] coldsideofyourpillow@lemmy.cafe 3 points 2 months ago

idk, combined with the gloomy atmosphere, it seems like its the only thing keeping OOP safe from a demonic spirit that was summoned during a sleepover using a death ritual

[–] REDACTED 1 points 2 months ago

I don't know, viking gods are kinda cool

[–] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 25 points 2 months ago

If your junk is making people uncomfortable, you should probably pull up your pants and close the zipper.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 14 points 2 months ago

The window. Get rid of it.

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 months ago

It's the largest thing in the room anyways. Imagine how much space that bedroom could habe without an useless bed!

[–] stefenauris@pawb.social 13 points 2 months ago

Remove the friend

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Throw out the bed, the stool, and the crucifix. Sleep on the bare floor, ideally naked. Peak minimalism achieved.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

When I were a lad we didn't sleep on floors, but would balance on the floorboards themselves

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Floorboards are unneccessary junk, rip them off and have a dirt floor instead.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Dirt is unnecessarily soft, better to dig down through the organic matter to the subsoil, and lie on that instead

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Actually, dig all way to bedrock, after all, it isn't called bedrock for no reason.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 2 points 1 month ago

Too smooth for my sensibilities, I'd prefer to go down to the metal outer shell

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago

Ark survival evolve gameplay

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

Tell her she can come out from under the bed.

[–] fenpy@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

You need to remove walls. Next time she'll be comfortable!

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Take all the Busch light cans out, yes the ones under the bed

[–] scholar@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

But they're propping up the mattress!

[–] TheBannedLemming@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I recommend purging the vengeful ghost or whatever evil spirit is haunting that place and getting out of whatever rural or abandoned town that building is located in. It's likely in the upper northeast or midwest and would be the kind of place that Stephen King would set his next novel in.

[–] A_Chilean_Cyborg@feddit.cl 3 points 1 month ago
[–] DrunkAnRoot@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

that stool needs to go the window the crucifix the bed the carpet the roof an door

[–] WereCat@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Remove boogeyman from under the bed. That will automatically remove the need for the cross.