this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 92 points 10 months ago (2 children)

He's so high he doesn't realize that the bug blocking his door is the professor

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 71 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)
[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Jerkface@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

makes awful whirring noise

[–] Mr_Fish@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

That would be because of the caffeine

[–] DrabPoultry@midwest.social 89 points 10 months ago (4 children)

This may have worked. I once excused a student for being late because the geese were being aggressive.

[–] toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world 37 points 10 months ago (4 children)

i'm not a teacher, but if i was i'd excuse it just because they took the effort to compose such a crazy story. probably learned more than i'd have taught them that day a anyway

[–] bampop@lemmy.world 21 points 10 months ago (1 children)

If the class was on Kafka I'd give them top marks

[–] toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

as an etymologyst, it really bugs me when i get n to my work

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I’m newly a teacher (of adults), and I accept literally any excuse anyone gives me. I suspect that I’ll change that as time goes on, but I don’t even really get excuses.

[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I'll generally accept it if you send any excuse prior to the lecture unless it's becoming a habit - in those rare cases I'll happily work with them to try and figure out a solution. 80% of the time it's family medical appointments or childcare scheduling issues (and my gosh I am so happy to accommodate people dealing with that) and the rare cases it's not we can usually find a way to make up for what they've missed. I've got a couple colleagues that only accept excuses with a doctor's note, and the best thing I can say about them is that they're ~~retiring soon~~ incredibly passionate about teaching.

(none of this applies to freshman courses, though. We've learned that being really strict about attendance for freshman year boosts passing rates by like 30%, it's just crazy.)

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[–] Anomalocaris@lemm.ee 19 points 10 months ago (10 children)

who cares about collage attendance?

in my uni no one cared, of you're late, it's just a bit rude, of you don't show up, no one cares.

what matters are the graded assignments and exams. if a student aces those but never stepped in a lecture hall, does that matter?

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

One of my biggest pet peeves in college was professors who took attendance. Bitch, I'm paying you to be here, if I don't want to come to class, that's on me. It was usually when they knew that most people could skip every class and still pass.

I even once had a class in a lecture hall with at least 100 students, where the teacher took attendance using some stupid "clicker" thing that we had to buy at the school bookstore. Ridiculous. Pisses me off just thinking about it.

[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

While it's good that you are disciplined enough that you can succeed without it, many students benefit greatly from a rigid structure more in line with the educational environment they experienced up to that point. After freshman year, attendance requirements are usually greatly relaxed since people have gotten into the swing of things (like not having to ask to to go to the bathroom anymore, god what even is the public school system). Personally I don't care if you show up or not, you'll learn something important either way and if someone uninterested isn't there it means I have more time for the other students.

Also I can 100% promise that clicker thing was a contractual obligation from the publisher and not the instructor's idea. Those things are fuckin' awful to support on the instructor's side, and goddamn Pearson managed to tie using their shitfucking software (including those goddamn clickers) to the state and federal grants unis rely on for funding. Fuck pearson.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Oh no, I skipped class all of the time lol I was a terrible student

This was a long time ago, and I think the clickers were like brand new. The professor was really into trying to make it work. They even tried to use them to quiz us during class. It was a living nightmare.

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[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I accepted "I'm sorry, it was just too nice a day to spend it sitting in a basement with no windows" once because man, they had a point.

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[–] Lawnman23@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Damn cobra chickens getting all hissy and angry just because I don’t have bread for them. Entitled bastards.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 83 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Respectfully, I am in tears,

My brain at random

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

Might make this my work signature tbh

[–] tdawg@lemmy.world 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Hey, the were honest. I'd let it fly

[–] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 15 points 10 months ago

And scare the poor student even more???

[–] SpruceBringsteen@lemmy.world 20 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

When I move

You move

just like that

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Hell yeah hey dj bring that back

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[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago (2 children)

ma'am, this is the last time i'm gonna tell you to stop that before i call Costco security.

[–] whostosay@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

If one more motherfucker walks in and says this shit in target I'm gonna lose it

[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Sir this is not a bug, it's a hot dog

[–] Badabinski@kbin.earth 8 points 10 months ago

I very much enjoy this reading of this post:

https://youtu.be/iE8FJdJlnnw

[–] whostosay@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

I'll allow it

[–] BangelaQuirkel@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Did nobody get the reference or is everybody in on the joke?

[–] whostosay@lemmy.world 27 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You have some bug jousting reference you wanna let the class in on?

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 3 points 10 months ago

Everytime I encounter a praying mantis, it's like this. I see them, them see me. I am like "oh cool a mantis." It gets all defensive, raising those fucking scythe arms. I am like "whoa bud chill" and then it flies at my face, I smack it out of the air and am like "now why'd you have to go an do that for? Now you're fucked up."

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