this post was submitted on 17 May 2025
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memes

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744
The Wife sent this one to me. (infosec.pub)
submitted 2 months ago by MyDarkestTimeline01@ani.social to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 55 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Vampire: "Can I come inside?"

English teacher: "I don't know, can you?"

[–] SnortsGarlicPowder@lemmy.zip 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Vampire: "...I am a vampire. I am physically unable to enter unless you say I can. Me asking can I come inside is correct, I have no ability to enter otherwise"

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 2 points 2 months ago

Vampire: "Nevermind" pulls out a gun and shoots the teacher

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 35 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If this joke was a person, it would be in 2nd grade and know how to read and write.

[–] MyDarkestTimeline01@ani.social 28 points 2 months ago

That's the most accurate description of my wife's sense of humor I've heard in a while.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 2 months ago (2 children)

All the poor baby vampire sperms dying on her back!

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 1 points 2 months ago

What if the vampire sperm is really long lived too?

[–] pewpew@feddit.it 12 points 2 months ago

"Yes, I invite you inside me, you can come now"

[–] toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

is she single?

[–] Fleur_@aussie.zone 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Vampire fucking is beastiality. We must purge the monster fuckers.

Unless of course I find them hot then it's okay

[–] klemptor@startrek.website 2 points 2 months ago

Spike from Buffy was my crack cocaine for a while there

[–] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 3 points 2 months ago

But what about vampires getting pregnant?

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago

At least they can come on the outside

[–] OrteilGenou@lemmy.world -1 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The implication is that vampire sex that doesn't result in pregnancy is ræpe

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You can consent to sex but not to come inside

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 months ago

You don't need to censor words here...