Why are people afraid of calls these days?
this post was submitted on 22 Sep 2023
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I wouldn't say we're afraid. I don't particularly like speaking on the phone though, but it's alright, I even worked call center for a while so it doesn't bother me much these days.
Anyways, essentially texting is just more efficient. I can't speak for everyone else, but for instance at work, I hate it when I have a question or need assistance on a specific topic, ask on my team chat and have a couple of people saying "quick call?".
If it's something really complex, fine... that's fair. Other than that? It's just so inefficient. I can be working on something else and just reply during my off time between tasks, same with whoever I ask help from. Also, most of the time I'm listening to music, or I have my TV with ambience sound on the background. So then I have to turn everything off just so I can go for a 5minute call for something that could be done over chat on the same amount of time.
Sorry this comment turned out way longer than I thought it would.
So asynchronous communication can be more efficient for certain types of communication, but in other scenarios synchronous communication will be more efficient. Learning to identify which type of communication fits which type of mode is a valuable skill to have, one I recommend that everyone develops.
I get what you mean. Overall, if it's not urgent I'd rather not make/receive calls.
I do miss that magic period of early cheap VoIP where my friends and I would have a call going more or less in the background while all doing our own things. A lower-cost impromptu hangout before we all had cars.
That was never about efficient transfer of information though. Calling with demands is just intrusive.
Not that I ever turn my ringer on. Dang robocallers.
Because I'm doing something else and I'm not going to just drop everything to receive information synchronously which could be sent asynchronously.
It's alright to press the red button, you know.
Because anything not important can be sent through a text. Most people call because it's something important or a big deal and at a lot of the times it's not a good call. So that's why people don't like phone calls because the thing that's on the other end is most likely non-desirable.
I find that it's generally more helpful to practice grabbing the metaphorical bull by the horns. The more you avoid it, the less used you are to dealing with it, and the worse it makes you feel.
I think it's an American thing. Calling someone isn't weird here in the civilised world. Maybe it's their problem with robocalls. Maybe their paying too much for calls.
Nah, it's a generational thing and an introvert thing.
Gen Z was born after the widespread adoption of cell phones with texting capability making old fashioned phone calls more or less obsolete outside of emergencies and the like and thus don't like the unnecessary hassle.
Meanwhile, some of us millenials and older are taking a cue from them and realising that we don't HAVE TO do phone calls all the time if we don't want to.
I live in Denmark and the only people who regularly call me are my boomer parents. Everyone else only call me if they need to get a hold of me immediately, as it should be.
I'm Gen X. I grew up with a landline and no caller ID, and if the phone rang you mostly just answered it, unless you were screening calls. Could be your best friend asking if you want to go to the mall, could be your least favorite aunt calling to whine at your mom for whatever her latest minor ailment is. In which case you're stuck making polite small talk until your mom is done drying her hair or whatever.
It sucked a lot.
Now I've got a cell and caller ID. Unless I'm expecting a call, I never answer the phone. If it's important, they'll leave a message. Usually it's not even a little bit important.
And my boomer mom just loves to call for a long pointless chat. If I see her name on the caller ID, I have to decide whether I have an hour minimum to waste because it's never shorter than that. 🙄
Nah, calls only if you can't put it in a few sentences, is a thing here too.
My family and my girlfriend are basically the only people allowed to do this. Everyone else - if you're calling me directly I will assume it's an emergency and will get annoyed if it's not.
Calls are fine. Unscheduled calls are not. Text me to set up a time to call that works for both. I am okay with giving you my undivided attention - just not necessarily right now.
What about your friends, do they have to schedule their calls?
I have plenty of friends, so that is the only way to keep it sustainable, yes.
Of course, everybody can unschedule call for an emergency or a time-sensitive thing, like "Hey we have decided last minute that we're hanging at at place X in like 10 minutes, wanna come?" - in those cases, I actually prefer to be called because I don't want to miss it.
It just to me sounds crazy to schedule calls with my friends
What I did to cut that out was to moan and answer like they just woke me up. Talk very slowly, take three seconds of "uuuuhhhhh" to answer every question and be as useless as possible. It isn't long before they hang up and send me the text they should have sent in the first place.
I work remotely and one of my favourite things is how people message to ask if you're free for a call.
"Whomst the fuck?" (C) Wizord, 2023
I just don't answer the phone at all if they can't bother to text (unless it's someone important to me).
I already blocked the number of my internet provider because they keep calling me for an appointment I had called off via email weeks ago by now.
Because I hate typing on mobile devices I don't like texting.
If you try to have a conversation with me over text Imma either call you if it's important or start giving you one word answers to everything.
Thankfully most people know better than to try and communicate with me in general!
Ok
Thing is that you can have a chat protocol and be asynchronous in communicating with text messages. That's something you can't have with voice calls.
Ohh, I'm fully aware.
I love messaging even I have a physical keyboard infront of me.
It's specifically the mobile keyboards I hate.
Oh I can totally relate with that. Mobile touchbased Keyboards are the worst. I loved my blackberry, and earlier Palm Pre, for having physical tacticle keys.
You could try using voice transcription.
Text to call. I also really like calls, but scheduled. Calling randomly to chat means you're taking my undivided attention for however long you want whenever you want and that's super disrespectful of my time
Then don't answer?
It's not like sending the call to voicemail is going to hurt my feelings.
Asking to call seems redundant. The call is the ask.
Just use predictive text and select whatever the most unhinged option that communicates your point. Only exception is that I draw the line are the constant attempts that thing tires to flirt with my mum. Seriously, the amount of 💘 😘 it suggests is concerning. I'm not American.
I need an AI phone agent to whine at CSRs more nicely than I am capable of doing any longer.
That is what I need.
Personally I’ve enjoyed taking calls from friends and family. I used to be scared to death of it.