Some balls are held for charity, and some for fancy dress, but when they're held for pleasure, they're the balls I like best.
this post was submitted on 07 May 2025
530 points (99.6% liked)
Rare insults
1608 readers
1 users here now
Post any unique insults you find!
Rules:
- No hateful Insults
- No personal information
- No politics
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Who's got big balls?
DOGE
I see AC/DC, I up vote.
It's the same as it was back then...
Loads of the wealthy and powerful showing off for each and wasting a shit ton of resources.
2025 or 1725, I don't give a shit how someone looks in an outfit that costs more than a house when people are starving.
Not having these wasteful events anymore would be a good thing.
I work in AV and recently worked a gala. They held an auction for various things, mostly getaways to a fancy summer home or chef dinner experiences. One of the chef experiences went for over $8,000. One of the other AV techs turned to me and said "$8,000 is a lot for one dinner." I leaned in close and said quietly "$8,000 would change my life."
I worked for a nonprofit for people with disabilities right after college. Like boots on the ground, changing an adults diaper while they laughed and treated it like a game. But it was rewarding work, and I legit loved my groups.
Owner was a millionaire, paid us basically minimum wage and had shitty facilities and used it as a tax haven basically for their other businesses.
Every year we had a fundraiser (not a full gala) but it was at a Billionaire's mansion. Not saying the owners last name but most Americans would recognize it.
We were expected to be wait staff for the event, run the auction, and basically be servants.
Fuck the rich.
Literally millions being thrown around in front of 20 something kids who knew first hand none of that money actually made it to the organization. People would bid 50k over what's something was worth and we were supposed to break down in tears of gratitude even though none of that money would actually go to a good cause.
Man, you got me craving $8,000.
I could go for $8000 too, now that you mention it…
As a one night experience, or is this a marriage negotiation? I've got $8,000 and an unmarried cousin lying around somewhere...
Damn, I already got married for free like a sucker
If you got married for free you made out like a bandit.
I leaned in close and said quietly “$8,000 would change my life.”
I'm getting older and more out-of-touch I think, so I'm genuinely curious. If you were handed $8k right now, what would you do with it?
Not OP, but I could pay off a good part of the crippling debt I have that's keeping me from saving 2x as much as I spend on paying it off. I have nothing at the moment and am barely surviving paycheck to paycheck and it's just hard... having some freedom now that I'm finally organized would he nice again. Working all the time and not having a dime to do anything all the time is a sad and stressful life.
At this time I won't be out of this until the end of 2026.
For your particular case, it wouldn't actually change your life tomorrow/next week, but would draw forward the day (by $8k) you'd have a changed life, right? I'm sorry for your situation. I truly hope it gets better for you. I was paycheck-to-paycheck for many years and know what thats like. I can tell you from the other side that all of your hard work right now is worth it. Post paycheck-to-paycheck is such a relief. Depending on how things go after that, it can get even better. I want that for you.
Not OP but I can think of a million ways $8k could be life changing. I could pay down loans/cards/medical debt, fill the fridge and pantry, maybe spend one or two solid months not waking up in a cold sweat because my family is one misfortune away from being homeless. Even without those things I could invest it in my wife's garden and so we don't have to worry about food, I could invest into my homelab and get rid of some subscriptions and even make some money if I wanted to. On that note you could buy a couple of vending machines and start brining in some passive income. It is hard to imagine once you've put the struggle behind you but even $800 would be a massive relief to most Americans.
I'd
- replace my laundry dryer,
- give each of my 2 favorite niephews a $3000 investment for when they graduate high school (tbh, probably more for the older niephew because he's 10 years closer to graduating, so has less time to accrue interest), and
- give the rest to the student-run food pantry at my college
Tbh, I'm financially doing ok.
That would be one of the cheaper auction items at the galas I've been to
I don't even think the men dreaming of the events (for the specific reason of finding a romantic partner) are enthralled by the pageantry.
In media, the trope is that the women at these things have no agency. Basically whatever man shows up to ask them to dance they end up ending up betrothed to, even if they have the personality of a wet noodle or an angry little dog.
I think that's what is so alluring to these guys. They long for a medium where their trash personalities aren't a liability.
It would be a good thing if that money needed to survive made it to what we now call the "middle" and "lower" classes. Instead, the wealth divide is ever widening, as the ultra-rich want more and more... More than they could ever need. Their great-great...grandchildren's entire lives are paid for! But, like giant corporations, it will never be enough...
The people who wish for those 'good old days' would have had a much, much harder time back then. The rules of conduct and manners required for even those people to LOOK at you was preposterous. Also there was no online incel community (or any online community). Meaning they would be really and truly alone in a way that would make them commit suicide in short order.
I believe they're called Daddy Daughter Dances. And they can get pretty creepy.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veiled_Prophet_Parade_and_Ball
I just want to wear a tux, a monocle, and some large medals while gossiping about the aristocracy.
there's not much stopping you from doing that today!
Will you be aghast at the antics of some charlatan, causing the monocle to drop out?
Awww yeah. And then I’ll say, “Good heavens!”
I still don’t understand why prom type stuff stops happening after highschool..
Like I have some killer elegant gowns and I have absolutely nowhere to wear them, ever.
Also as an aside, I have my grandmothers monocle, and those things are damned near impossible to get to stay on your eye, because they are heavy and the lenses are thick and obtrusive. I can’t imagine they were actually meant to be worn that way. I’m sure they were and maybe there were different style ones, but just my experience with that one says it wouldn’t have been at all comfortable.
Just go to a contra or square dance and meet folk. They're not class-locked.
Go south enough you'll get the polka infused mexican two stepping
I hope Whoever introduced the accordian to Mexico had the worst death.
Contra? I'm not sure I want to learn dancing from a member of a far right paramilitary group from Nicaragua..
It's a type of folk dance popular in New England. Think line or square dancing, with the moves called by a caller.
Edit: it's been described to me as a couples dance where you spend most of your time dancing with people other than your partner.
I might be down to learn it from a burnt out Baltimore philosopher though
Square dancing comes from the the cotillion dance, so you kinda can do this whenever you want. At least the cool, working class version.
I mean, it's fair to argue that square dancing is working class, but cool?
Maybe if Zendaya and her fiancée Spiderman start doing it 🤷
Meet up sites host these all the dang time. Especially around holiday themes or women who like to dress up as fae.
Oh yes I am, tyvm.