this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2025
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[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 86 points 6 months ago (4 children)

If you want to go back in time, killing Hitler is not the solution! Go back in time, and kill this fucker

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 31 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Well going abck 80 odd years and finding hitler is much easier than going back an indeterminate amount of millions and finding this exact fish.

But I completely agree.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Even easier. Go back and kill Taft.

https://youtu.be/hLiI6kXZkZI

Wilson doesn't win the 1912 election, and much of the European theater of WW2 probably never happens. Also fascism and racism are handed a pretty firm defeat

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Or Teddy's forcing the issue causes the same conditions that enabled fascism in Germany and Italy to arise in already segregated America during the Great Depression instead of FDR's pseudo-social-democracy, and the American Empire that starts WW2 has unlimited oil, coal, steel, and manpower compared to the Nazis. Wilson wasn't behind American Exceptionalism, he was just silly enough to think it was the same thing as democracy. He was very flawed, obviously, but he was a true believer in the Republic and diplomacy, and no one even tried to make a League of Nations with Teddy at the helm.

Without the Soviets, no one supports the Maoists, so a stable proto-fascist Chiang Kai Shek allies with the Japanese Empire.

They easily crush the unstable, divided, and much less militarized Russian Republic (whose monarchist element was about to start a civil war to reinstate the Tsar) and conquer the European colonies in the Pacific. They are helped in this endeavor by the emerging Polish, Ukrainian, and Baltic partisans who fight for independence in their Russian-occupied states, having never even gained independence during the Revolution.

America, having largely been busy conquering South America, joins the war against the British, French, and Dutch Empires and between the American and Japanese fleets sinks the British Navy in its entirety.

The war is over. Fascism has won, having not made the idiotic mistake of basing itself in Germany and Italy, countries without access to the resources they need to build modern militaries, like rubber and oil, and without the navies they need to fight the people who do own the colonies that make it.

Americans don't even get public healthcare out of it all.

Alternative history is dumb because you can just say whatever nonsense you feel like to support your narrative.

The end.

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 3 points 6 months ago (3 children)

If you can time travel I'm sure you can track down the only fish walking on land at that time. After that you just gotta make sure the ocean critters stay where they belong!!

[–] lordnikon@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago

I feel like that will turn into wacky a mole as Malcom says Life finds a way.

[–] voracitude@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

the only fish walking on land

If that were how evolution works... maybe. Unfortunately it doesn't, at all, so definitely not.

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 4 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

The meme is usually that this single fish is responsible for every single human problem, I was just playing along with that. I don't really think that it was only a single fish walking on land back then. Had to be exactly two, how else would they reproduce /s

[–] voracitude@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Ahh, we need an /s for deadpan. I'd use it often. I appreciate you taking the time to explain though! Sometimes, I need it 😅

[–] FauxPseudo@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Tell us to don't understand evolution without telling us you don't understand evolution.

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 1 points 6 months ago

Evolution is a myth. I never seen an animal evolve into a Pokémon smh

[–] samus12345@lemm.ee 14 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 10 points 6 months ago

Ooooh I wish I wish I had not killed that fish is something I say alllllllll the time when I do something by accident.

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 7 points 6 months ago (3 children)

The Simpsons is always predicting the future... So we got a chance!

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 1 points 6 months ago

But if it's time travel would the past be your future?

[–] MothmanDelorian@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago

Targeting John Calvin and his early followers would be a good choice as well as Calvinism is responsible for Prosperity Gospel beliefs.

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 63 points 6 months ago (1 children)

did he teleport to Elon Musk on stage from the last inauguration?

[–] obinice@lemmy.world 50 points 6 months ago (3 children)

the last inauguration

When you say the last inauguration, you don't mean the last inauguration... r-right?

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 27 points 6 months ago

Anakin's glare.jpg

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 24 points 6 months ago (1 children)

they meant the final inauguration

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 13 points 6 months ago

Ba da da da

Ba da da da da

Ba da da da

Ba da da da da

[–] samus12345@lemm.ee 6 points 6 months ago

The coronation.

[–] samus12345@lemm.ee 56 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This guy just really likes odd gestures.

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 33 points 6 months ago (1 children)

He's just sending his heart out, okay! Don't judge him by taking it out of context!

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Hitler with a time machine, I sense an Earl 2000's sitcom in the works.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago

Is that the Sequel to My Name is Earl?

[–] elvith@feddit.org 3 points 6 months ago

The rules are the rules. At least one person read IATT Bulletin 1147 before their trip ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] hsdkfr734r@feddit.nl -2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Finding Hitler isn't the hard part of time traveling. Ideally you would need to be not too far above Earth's surface, moving with the same speed and in the right direction - to prevent suffocation or to just leave a greasy stain.

If you get this right, from my point of view, you earned yourself the right to applaud yourself and maybe even Hitler (I'm won't kink shame).

[–] MothmanDelorian@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It’s sad how many people don’t get that “time” includes the relative placement of objects in space and that going back 50 years might mean Earth is in a difference physical location than yourself.

[–] RogueBanana@lemmy.zip 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I don't get these arguments. If we ate talking about hypothetical scenarios when we invent time machine to go back to a particular point in time, why not assume we can also choose a particular point in space, predict where earth would be or view the space before you jump in yourself. This is just a simple comic anyway, not deep enough to talk about viability of time travel.

[–] hsdkfr734r@feddit.nl -1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

This is just a simple comic anyway, not deep enough to talk about viability of time travel.

It's nice to think about things. Do you think thinking about things should be limited real things?

If it was assumed that you can't change the future but fork a new thread of reality instead, it would be as relevant.

I agree with you, that it is OK if you don't think there is a need for you to enter that train of thought, though.

[–] RogueBanana@lemmy.zip 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The beginning of your comment sounded aggressive and that others are idiots for laughing about this comic without considering limitations of time travel. Probably want your intention but that's how it looked to me and why I left the comment. Never claimed we can't talk about imaginary things, just that we don't necessarily have to.

[–] hsdkfr734r@feddit.nl 1 points 6 months ago

I don't know. I didn't feel aggressive when I typed it. I was in a quite content mood, and I didn't want to imply anything. Just needed to kill a few minutes while typing and was enjoying myself. So if it felt aggressive to you, I'm sorry.

Yes, maybe then, I needed to point out that time travelling has its hardships, to which people turn a blind eye at times. And I'm sure an ironic tone was intended by me.