this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2024
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LinkedinLunatics

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A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

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Yes, I know this is satire

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[–] Lazycog@sopuli.xyz 179 points 10 months ago (4 children)

This dude is a god damn legend.

My previous employer would print out those cringe success and team building story posts from linkedin and hang them around the office because we complained about the working environment, I love that there is good satire of those posts on linkedin now.

[–] BlueLineBae@midwest.social 56 points 10 months ago

The more things change the more they stay the same. Before LinkedIn there were motivational posters that were hung around offices. It didn't take long for the demotivational poster to make its way into the culture just like these posts are now.

[–] TriflingToad@lemmy.world 31 points 10 months ago

take one down and hang this up in its place lol

[–] bacon_saber@fedia.io 22 points 10 months ago (3 children)

wtf kind of hell did you work in, lol

[–] Lazycog@sopuli.xyz 7 points 10 months ago

Yeah felt like being in a fever dream sometimes honestly

[–] Arbiter@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

corporate America, I assume

[–] AeonFelis@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

The regular kind, probably?

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

My former employer had a stupid idea that alternating our stats and our company “core values” on tvs throughout the office was a good idea. Yeah, let’s just waste electricity on something no one wants to look at. I would just turn them off and say I valued conservation.

Edit: it helped that I’d long before loudly established that I hated when people left the light on in the server closet. The closet was right across from my desk so I noticed every time.

[–] paddirn@lemmy.world 86 points 10 months ago (1 children)

“Nobody has ever hated their boss.”

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

Honestly my first tip that this was satire.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 38 points 10 months ago (1 children)

See, that's good thinking!

Me? I took my step child in, treated them well, taught them self defense and martial arts, then adopted them. HUGE mistake, now they bloody well know that they're gong to inherit the house some day, and are playing the long game, waiting for me to die on my own instead of shivving me in the kidney like a proper stepdad should go down.

Such a rookie error on my part.

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Didn't your stepson just fuck off to Bludhaven after a few years?

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 7 points 10 months ago

Lmmfao! Gods, I wish I had thought of that. Wasn't where I was going, but that made me envious of you having caught it.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 26 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The first two lines, together with your title did lead me to believe this story was going in a very nasty direction.

[–] crmsnbleyd@sopuli.xyz 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's my own sordid mind...

[–] Speculater@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

Nothing wrong with being organized.

[–] AlexisFR@jlai.lu 18 points 10 months ago

Not a lunatic. It's just the Ken M of LinkedIn.

[–] P4ulin_Kbana@lemmy.eco.br 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 17 points 10 months ago

Shaka, when the walls fell.

[–] Mammothmothman@lemmy.ca 12 points 10 months ago

Linked in is becoming self aware!

[–] veroxii@aussie.zone 10 points 10 months ago

I heard she's fast tracked for CEO.

[–] mo_lave@reddthat.com 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's not your stepdaughter, it's Alpharius

[–] Maalus@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

It's always Alpharius