Home Assistant is open source home automation that puts local control and privacy first.
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Home Assistant can be self-installed on ProxMox, Raspberry Pi, or even purchased pre-installed: Home Assistant: Installation
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How comfortable are you re-flashing devices and doing a bit of event/automation programming? I use an iFan04-L for the fan+light and then coded the button events from a Martin-Jerry dimmer to change the fan speed and toggle the light.
You'd need to flash the iFan04 but you can get the MJ stuff with Tasmota preinstalled (Amazon stuff was different firmware but their website gives you a choice)
I would be comfortable with that, but I definitely prefer devices that retain the wall controls like a normal wall switch. And will work even if the smart home goes down. I should have mentioned that in my post.
The ifan has a remote, so not quite a wall switch, but still doesn't require HA to make things happen.
I just installed one in a fan in our dining room as a test. Flashed with Tasmota.
That's totally fair. In my case I was also limited because the location originally had just lights (so only hot+neutral+ground) but if you want to control lights+fan separately you need at least 3 wires+ground (common neutral, shared ground, hot for fan, hot for light).
In your case, maybe something like the Treatlife DS03 might do the job? I've never used it myself but it does have separate wires for load and fan-load, there's a Tasmota template, and still did a fairly decent write-up
I did the Treatlife DS02S switch by flashing an ESP12F module with ESPHome following the guide here, then swapped the wireless module.
Works well as a normal independent switch with local control from Home Assistant.
Yeah your solution would be the best if I didn't have fan wiring going to the wall. I wouldn't want to make the wall switch totally obsolete.
I looked at the Treatlife but apparently they changed the chipset and it's no longer flashable :/
Ah, those freaking WB3S chips area huge pain in the ass we they've been replacing the ESP Tuya on newer models