this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2024
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[–] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 73 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Remember, you're a ghost piloting a walking tent of bone, blood, and flesh using a grey jelly computer running on ConfusedMeat_OS.

As is everyone and everything living that you know.

[–] Okokimup@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Also, you're being co-habited by just a massive amount of bacteria, each of which has their own priorities.

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I like to think of myself as a walking city. Makes me feel important.

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

I'm a walking unprofitable for-profit prison.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 3 points 10 months ago

Consider them crew

[–] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 61 points 10 months ago (4 children)
[–] yokonzo@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)

God someone stitch the blood donation post under that

[–] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] v4ld1z@lemmy.zip 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

You sure made that easy. Thanks! I don't actually have any opinions on the matter

[–] cocobean@sh.itjust.works 11 points 10 months ago

Conspiracy by Big Jenga

[–] swag_money@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

today's meta is jenga posting

[–] rain_worl@lemmy.world 0 points 10 months ago

capitalism trying to extract as much blood from humans as possible

[–] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 32 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Literally just got out of the hospital from a fall in the bathroom the other day. Got to ride the wee woo wagon and everything and don't remember any of it.

Edit: I've got two black eyes, what'll probably be a forehead scar, and a very sore body.

[–] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Oh and we've got some drywall work to do because while I got the blood stains off (apparently made a bit of a mess after I got knocked unconscious), I also ripped the toilet paper holder off the wall and put a good hit in on the heater in the fall. Got pictures too if anybody ever thinks the infomercials about seniors falling were being overdramatic, I'm in my 20s.

[–] Zoidsberg@lemmy.ca 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Morbidly curious about those pictures.

[–] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 18 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Don't worry, not gruesome, like I said, I got the blood stains off:

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Damn bro glad your okay. That could've been brain damage.

[–] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 10 months ago

Yeah that was the bulk of the concern everybody had when I woke up in the ER.

[–] Ifera@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Adorable eyeshadow, my darling. Also, glad you're OK, here is hoping you recover soon ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

[–] snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Got to ride the wee woo wagon

AKA Amberlamps

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Bambalance!

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 27 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I don't like that so many shower doors are glass. I can't stop myself constantly imagining a Final Destination situation where I slip, fall into the door, shatter the glass and decapitate myself.

[–] boogetyboo@aussie.zone 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I like to dance in the shower. I'm basically driving behind the logging truck.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

A logging truck is probably safe to follow, an 8m log isn't going to slide off the stack

[–] boogetyboo@aussie.zone 2 points 10 months ago

No I saw a documentary and they fly at you like torpedoes

[–] SparrowRanjitScaur@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I believe they're usually tempered so they don't break in large pieces. They usually shatter into small rounded pieces. Source: My cousin broke our shower stall.

[–] FauxPseudo@lemmy.world 22 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I was on digging trenches in the yard for sprinklers when my then girlfriend came out onto the porch. She was kind of staring off into space. "What's up?" " I just got a phone call. My mom died." "Congratulations." "Thank you."

She was a new girlfriend and I did not know anything about the history between her and her mom. But apparently my response was exactly the right one. Mom had slipped and died in her bathroom.

[–] Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de 25 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

She was a new girlfriend and I did not know anything about the history between her and her mom. But apparently my response was exactly the right one.

Talk about high risk low to medium reward, holy shit what a daredevil

[–] FauxPseudo@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

Each person that has ever dated me has understood that I will never react appropriately in a social situation. Not because I act out of spite but because I have zero clue as to what I'm doing.

[–] MadBob@feddit.nl 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes people fall from an aircraft and bounce jovially off the ground; sometimes people turn their heads too quickly and tear the fabric keeping their windpipe in place.

[–] rain_worl@lemmy.world 0 points 10 months ago

boioioioing
yeehee!

[–] RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

Or when you're on the treadmill and then one of your steps is an inch too far to the side.

[–] buttfarts@lemy.lol 7 points 10 months ago

Them internal organs be poppin'

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

MORTAL KOMBAT!!!

[–] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What if I'm taking a shower and I slip on a bar of soap?

OH MY GOD I'D BE KILLED!

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

By the colonel, in the kitchen, with a giant vibrator.

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 10 months ago

Sounds like a fun weekend