this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
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Suicidal Man Urged By Onlookers To Jump From Higher Floor (www.theonion.com)
submitted 1 year ago by can@sh.itjust.works to c/theonion@midwest.social
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[–] CorneliusTalmadge@lemmy.world 59 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do a flip!

[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago

Please, old friend, don't jump! Use another method that won't damage your liver. Other people need it, you know.

[–] kamenlady@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

At press time, reports confirmed firefighters had arrived to carry the man to the top floor.

He was lucky to have such good people supporting him to succeed.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago

I can only hope I'll be so lucky.

[–] PythagreousTitties@lemm.ee 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"The people who love you want you dead, not injured!”.

That's... Actually a very valid concern.