Alright, look at me, deer comrade. Look. at. me.

["NY Rush" starts playing out of nowhere]

So you do not seem to understand the implications of what I have written: somehow the parse tree that you have subconsciously drawn in your mind is completely different from the interpretation that I intended when I typed those 26 words. So I will now clarify exactly what I am trying to say: I would feign — that is, I would completely and utterly fabricate — an overtly enthusiastic support for the actually revolting American imperialist project that is the North Atlantic Treaty Organization, if, and only if, doing so would mean that I would attract the attention of a set of anthropomorphized communist hyenas. Not the hyenas in the picture, though — they aren't anthropomorphized enough, you see.

So in other words, I am attempting to imply that I desire to be publicly humiliated and mayhaps even eaten.

By furries.

Sexual style.

Do you understand what I'm saying now? I mean, I'm a real freak. I'm not normal. Like, I want it to scare the shit out of me, too. I want to be an entirely different person by the end of the first eight hours.

You thought chaotic evil was bad? Get ready for lawful evil!

aardwulfs! aardwulfs! aardwulfs!

Seriously though you have to respect a species that gives birth through a gigantic penis.

Like it's obviously a horrible idea and makes you question exactly what "Survival of the fittest" even means, but you still have to respect it.