Tired of being beta
Eat beans
this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2024
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chapotraphouse
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No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
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Dunk posts in general go in the_dunk_tank, not here
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Addendum: If the beans don't make you fart then eat more beans until you're farting
Wolves are the alpha animals so be like the wolves
Do this with your homies:
steps to be an alpha man*
step 1: sex with women is gay. stop doing that.
step 2: have sex with men
step 3: you are alpha now
*steps may differ with other genders
Take a bottle of Infowars 1776 Testosterone Boost everyday.
Go around and tell anyone and everyone you see that you're alpha. Make it your entire personality
Call the gym and hit a lawyer.
To learn how to top, you must first master being a bottom.
That's what you meant, right?
Get a truck, an old cap, and a pair of Oakleys. Get drunk and shoot a two hour video in the front seat, just you ranting into the camera.
technically you can get a DUI for being drunk behind the wheel (even if you're not actually moving), but that only adds to the alpha-ness
reduce the amount of testing you do
Squats
YouTube has taught me that it has something to do with exclusively eating raw meat and organs, so maybe try that?
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buy the latest Ford F350 Child Smashifier brand new for $78,000
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take out 3 loans to afford this
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drive on a 2 drink minimum
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call anyone who drives a different brand of truck gay even though you can't tell the difference unless you look at the hood ornament
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run over at least 3 children and/or bicyclists a month
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drive it into a resevoir and buy the next latest model when it comes out (you'll save money by doing this, it can carry 8 ounces more cargo in the 16 inch truck bed)
flip the script and become an omega
lower your opacity
You have to apply for a membership upgrade.
Train your flexibility until you can autofellate
Like this, liberal
Leaded supplements and praying.
Buy my supplements 
~~Seinfeld~~
COSTANZA
Why become an alpha when you can become shrigma 
Have you tried ligma? Or grabon?