Socialanxiety

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A safe space for people to discuss their experiences, feelings and thoughts on social anxiety and socialphobia.

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SorryforSmelling@lemmy.blahaj.zone

The cycle of anxiety (infosec.pub)

submitted 2 years ago by ickplant@lemmy.world to c/socialanxiety@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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It's really important to understand this cycle. Every time you decide to avoid a social situation, your anxiety lessens, which feels great in the short run. But in the long term, avoidance only leads to more anxiety because you don't get chances to practice skills and to discover that the reality is often less scary than your imagination.

The best way to reduce social anxiety is to practice socializing intentionally. You can set measurable and realistic goals, like "I will spend 3 minutes making small talk with the barista" or "I will compliment my coworkers twice weekly" or "I will stay at the party for an hour and talk to 2 different people, asking at least 3 questions each time."

Find a small way to start exposing yourself to social situations, even if it's just getting out of the house and going for a walk in the park among other people. The more you avoid, the worse it gets - even though it will feel great initially when you avoid.

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[–] rix501@programming.dev 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I definitely feel this many times. What is the line between trying to practice and things I should be ok avoiding?

[–] SorryforSmelling@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 years ago

realising this circle has helped me so much personally. i have spend some time to evaluate, what situations are okay to avoid in the sense of self care. this often varies. like if i need some alone time to recharge, i am easier on myself. another thing that helped me a lot is to learn how to leave. and to allow myself to leave a social event whenever i feel overwhelmed. so sometimes i go to a meet up and leave after five minutes. i still got five minutes of exposure. and knowing that i can leave any time helps me go to things i would have avoided in the past aswell. thats all my personal experience tho. and there is no way to know what works for you without trying.