I don’t even understand the point of American coffee brands. It’s just repackaging coffee from the same places as everyone else unless you’re one one of the large companies that actually own plantations. Like Alex Jones’ coffee is just Zapatista coffee lol
this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2024
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Because freedom means having different branding on a shelf of completely identical products
The coffee companies in America are coffee roasters. Coffee in not grown in America (except Hawaii), but coffee is roasted in America. When coffee is shipped to America, it is still in the green, uncooked form. Coffee is not roasted on the plantations because the quality of the coffee more rapidly declines in the roasted form. It is better that coffee is shipped in the uncooked, green form. Since the quality of coffee rapidly declines after being roasted, you will get the highest quality coffee from a coffee roaster nearest to you. Each roasting company also roasts the coffee in slightly different ways.
The Alex Jones coffee is a branding gimmick though.
A lot of smaller coffee roasteries buy directly from small farms they have agreements with, and this guarantees that the coffee will taste good and interesting.
Then again, the majority of these places are focused on specialty coffee, so they aren't going to roast the beans to hell and back and make bitter, burnt rubber-tasting ass coffee. Anything with a somewhat large distribution network will just get random green beans from wherever and roast it to shit to have an uniform product, which is a shame.
because pretty much every economic and political choice left to the consumer is a matter of aesthetics. Does the brand around which you form your identity explicitly or implicitly hates LGBTQ? It's very important that they get to choose one.
you can buy from specific small (or large ig) farms abroad and then roast it. if anything the large companies have the harder job trying to homogenize their output when they sell more coffee than any one plantation can provide. "same as everyone else" could be any of many thousands of farms, who grow in different conditions, different elevations, shade levels, soil, etc
This is true, but it's also equally true that the darker the coffee roast, the closer the end product gets to literal charcoal, therefore making the provenance of the beans far less relevant. That's why starbucks definitionally cannot have a mass-market light roast or even a "true" medium roast.
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i would be shocked if the company that tried to get Kyle Rittenhouse as a spokesman actually had coffee that tasted 4/10 or higher
points at the sign
Americans do not consume substance, they consume pure marketing.
As eloquently stated by the great philosopher Calvin:
marketing or social status
Any white coded products will be more expensive and worse
But but the rifle is black?
Years ago I used to work for an online tech sales company. We would often sell the same exact product with different brand names and prices. Many American customers would not be convinced to save money even after being given that information.
Of course it's bland
Anything with flavor offends the I ONLY DRINK BLACK COFFEE PLAIN LIKE A MAN jerks
I do prefer black coffee but for the fucking flavor
This coffee is shitty, the only kind i need to add cream and sugar to
There's this Hawaiian roast from Roasting plant (idr it's name) and it'll make the best iced black coffee ever.
It has its own sweetness and even has green tea after notes.
If you're adding flavors to your coffee, it probably wasn't good to begin with. A properly pulled doubleshot is amazing.
I will only drink coffee if it tastes like a cake, I am not drinking straight bean juice!
That just makes me shudder. I'd rather take a slice of cake with a side of black coffee myself. Sweet coffee just feels off.
When I first started drinking coffee, I didn't get the point of a packet of sugar. The coffee was still overpowering. You'd need to up the sugar content by a factor of 10 to get anywhere, so I just went with black coffee. An old roommate had the seem realization but went the other way -- he would add the equivalent of 10 packets of sugar by just pouring from the sugar container for an uncomfortable length of time. Now the ridiculously sweet coffee is a regular menu item you can order without feeling self-conscious.
extremely chud company. of course their coffee stinks
See I just assumed and heard people talking shit on the Internet but every time I've discussed with people irl they're just like "no it's good"
People said the same about Dunkin coffee, literally inferior to 7-11 coffee
are these irl people chuds? can't imagine why anyone else would go to bat for the white supremacist coffee company. chuds have to pretend to like it for culture war reasons, it's not about the coffee
My little brothers are but mostly just no-politics 
types i think
further proof that "no politics" in America = chud by default
"no politics" = fine with status quo = chud
exactly, if you prod most "apolitical" folks it won't take long before you get to "of course I support the military/police!"
People said Dunkin coffee was good?
Massholes delenda est
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It's the only coffee sold at my local gun store.
I got a free sample in the early days.
It's aggressively bad.
Iirc it's either mostly or entirely robusta.
Robusta can be good, but bad coffee is just bad coffee.
Iirc it's either mostly or entirely robusta.
my assumption is that all these BLACK RIFLE NAVY SEALS OPERATOR coffee brands are just Robusta that's been over-roasted, burned, and extremely bitter because for some reason that's what Americans think is "strong" and good
my brother drinks one called ☠DEATH WISH COFFEE☠ like even if it was the best coffee in the world (which it obviously isn't) I wouldn't buy that shit out of pure cringe
why can't guys just be normal, why does every stupid product have to appeal to their fragile masculinity
Death Wish's Valhalla Java blend is unironically worth a try, albeit pricey for what it is. The regular Death Wish is kind of meh; I found it to be kind of acrid from all the extra caffeine more than anything.
Edit: The Valhalla Java stuff is a medium-dark roast with arabica and robusta, so take from that what you will.
It’s the coffee equivalent of a guy with a goatee wearing Oakleys while ranting in the front seat of an overpriced pickup truck.
at least those trucks are actually expensive and big and imposing. overroasted, bitter coffee doesn't even have more caffeine content! light roast, fruity coffee generally has more caffeine and is "stronger" than the stuff that tastes like death. they're just drinking garbage to feel manly, it's so stupid.
Zapatista coffee > chud garbage
You should try to get your brother hooked on it: https://schoolsforchiapas.org/store/coffee-corn-and-agricultural/zapatista-coffee/
It is very good coffee, I can second the recommendation.
Someone at my workplace left a Black Rifle travel mug in the bathroom. I took the opportunity to anonymously trash it 😎
I figure that if they had good coffee then they would put that in their advertising.
Hog coffee is truly the greatest innovation capitalism provides.
oh yeah its really bad lmao
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