chapotraphouse

Fucking christ, I don't want to doxx myself more than I may have with the crumbs I've left behind on my current account, but, I've had to deal with these god damn losers to much too. I've made myself a pretty public face in a lot of local scenes which contain a lot of white people calling themselves anarchists; and when I joined PSL and started being open about like "Hey we're organizing this for Palestine" I got nothing but hate from these crackers. They're chauvinistic, deluded motherfuckers who pick on women and minorities because it's easier. I genuinely don't know how to deal with these fucking people, it's bizarre, there's so many connections that I considered friends but as soon as I started actually doing what I've been preaching (I've been an open communist for years, everyone knows) I'm suddenly enemy number one. It's been absolutely fucking terrible and has eroded my mental health, for what it's even worth, severely.

Right now I think we're finding that ML organizations are beginning to gain steam because there's people like me who've become completely disillusioned with the anarchist and "horizontal" organizing that's lead to jack and shit getting done or accomplished. ML organizations are the groups which have been able to articulate most meaningfully how this struggle is connected and have, in my experience, worked most successfully with local Palestinian and other anti-imperialist groups; this is why I joined PSL for god's sake! But jokers like this, useless self-defeating white chauvinistic people like this, I don't know what the hell to do with them. If we're not able to get past people like this as a movement for liberation, we'll get nowhere, their anti-intellectualism and adventurist tendencies (as well as general tendency for dramatic bullshit) are so counterproductive that it will lead to a new failed left if there's not a well-reasoned, articulated, and popular resistance against people like this. Fucking sick of it.

Edit: And to add, I've had to deal with so much paternalistic bullshit from white guys in their 30s who consider themselves "very serious organizers" who after lengthy conversations simply fall back onto thought terminating cliches (authoritarianism) or just outright threats of violence towards me and my friends. I have so much frustration built up it's ridiculous, I wish to god there was a clear solution but I nor anyone around me who's in a similar position can articulate it.