"I have the worst phone.

Seriously, Pluto needs to give its citizens better phones and start feeding its people!

Why don't the people just overthrow the government of Pluto already?

Welp, gotta slap more sanctions on Pluto. That'll teach 'em!"

I asked and one person answered with a U.S. military invasion.

But tell me, comrades...

How would you specifically topple the government of Pluto and "free" the people of Pluto from the evil dictator (also apparently named Pluto)?

This is a matter of foreign policy importance!

As JFK said:

"Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do to Pluto to fuck up that place."

(This was before he got CIA'd, of course.)

That's right:

Hexbear is now Radio Free Pluto, y'all.

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[–] Red_Sunshine_Over_Florida@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'd go for the leader of Pluto by having a CIA team led by Wile E. Coyote and Marvin the Martian recruit a team of exiled Plutonian bourgeois to attempt hundreds of different assassination schemes. The most ambitious would be trying to get the leader to run into a brick wall that we painted to look like a attractive woman at a tunnel entrance. If that doesn't work, we'll try dropping pianos, safes, and anvils on him from five story book depositories. Hopefully the blowback should be minimal.

We'll solicit public support at home for this through a propaganda campaign cooked up by think tank intellectuals connected to the ACME corporation. When we take back the country for freedom, ACME will assume ownership of 78 percent of current state-owned assets and enterprises.

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 2 points 1 year ago

Good ideas all around! Keep 'em coming!