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(Rant) sad about life (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net

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I finally filed for divorce from my abusive wife recently. I believe she might be a clinical psychopath at this point. She picked a fight with me on my 40th birthday the other day and this ruined the time I had with my daughter. She did things like this constantly.

I just feel like she has finally completely broken me as a person...I now am unsure if I can get better. I will stay alive for my daughter's sake, but some days I really don't want to be.

I have no real resources. I have no money. Most therapists I've seen have been terrible. Most people I talk to don't seem to believe me that I've been abused. I just cannot take this anymore.

I finally got on a couple dating apps to see if that made me feel better and it had totally the opposite. It set off a very bad downward spiral.

I feel like I have a lot to offer. I'm funny, kind, smart, a talented musician/artist, I think I'm handdome even (can't post a pic obviously), but no one seems to care. It's like when I put my confidence to practice I get rejected and reminded why I shouldn't have any.

I don't know if I'll ever get better.

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[–] 2Password2Remember@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

don't hold it against yourself though. the idea that you can just go on an app and get a relationship is very appealing, trying it is nothing to be ashamed of

Death to America

[–] sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago

Definitely. Especially when I have felt utterly alone, unloved, and neglected for nearly half my life.