this post was submitted on 13 Mar 2024
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Thinking of Moving to the City (hexbear.net)
submitted 1 year ago by bubbalu@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net
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Where I live now, things are okay. I have friends I see regularly, a stable job, and the prospect of owning a home in the next few years. At the same time, it is absolutely sprawling and street life is absolutely non-existent. Cultural life is oriented around bars and events and it is hard for things to happen spontaneously.

Meanwhile, I grew up in a different city which had a much more vibrant street life, and it was borderline possible to live without a car. I am at a real crossroads here now deciding if I should cut it and move home, or keep going with the life I am building here.

In general I struggle with depression, and I am worried I am fixating on changes in my extrinsic conditions as a deflection from my inner work/inner struggles.

Would like to here other's perspectives, and particularly the experience of people who have made a big move recently.

Staying Pros

  • No major life disruption
  • Continue with stable job
  • Cost of Living lower
  • Most friends live here

Staying Cons

  • No street life
  • Must drive to do anything---feel shut-in

Leaving Pros

  • No car!
  • Closer to family
  • Street Life
  • Bigger Gay scene
  • Start Over lite

Leaving Cons

  • Job hunt
  • Major life disruption
  • Might just be 'grass is greener'
  • Leave friends
  • Higher Cost of Living
  • Continue my very patchy work history
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[–] Torenico@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

Street life is cool for the first five days. After that you will hate cars, smoke, sounds, cops everywhere and people yelling and arguing over nothing. I have depression and every time I go out (I live in a city, major one) I want to disappear from earth.

Maybe I'm being over the top, but city life has a lot of downsides that I would gladly trade for some peace and quiet. Also being a potential homeowner means a lot, how about you achieve that first and then move? Perhaps securing a home of your own is ideal, considering how bad things are.