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US men are dying much earlier than women, as death 'gender gap' widens: Study
(medicalxpress.com)
this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2023
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I’m a bit concerned about using the “gender gap” term. As in, I wonder if it’s going to get adopted by misogynists to pit women’s suffering (gender pay gap) against men’s suffering (gender lifespan gap).
It is certainly telling that your first reaction isn't about the real subject of the study.
Maybe you’re right, I’m sorry. It was just a first thought, and I’m trying to put thoughts out there on Lemmy less sensors to get convos going. Maybe this was an inappropriate one though and I can certainly choose better choices moving forward!
No worries. If you spend your life worrying what dickheads will think, you won't make any societal progress.
Lol this guy is shamelessly accepting your apology and dismissing any potential issues on behalf of someone else 😂
The person has already apologized for an unintentional slight. What exactly is there left to do except accept it and move on?
What are you expecting to accomplish by pushing on the issue?
You don’t accept an apology on behalf of someone else implying it was unnecessary. It’s dishonest at best.
It was an understandable faux pas in a public conversation. Not something personally offensive to a particular individual. Fucking chill.
I called you out because it didn’t seem like a mistake. I answered your question calmly when you appeared to double down.
My comment was mostly to show others that it was someone else accepting the apology.
I said 'no worries' because in normal contexts, you'd be right in that there is no issue. But in gender discussions both sides aren't accepting of commentary that switches focus to the other gender, but you may not know that if you don't join in on them often.
Obviously I can't speak for the person they responded to, nor the people reading these messages for that matter, but I can try and be reasonable. What reasonable person is going to want to do anything other than bury the hatchet after an honest mistake?
Edit: oh and sorry for getting a bit snippy with you.
Ok. Fyi I have not be trying to be confrontational after my first response. I don’t think you need to provide further justification after you said it was a mistake. Personally I think the issue was settled with your admission. I don’t mean to berate you. I should have made that clearer on my second response.
Even comparing the two issues that you brought up is ridiculous to me. Issue 1, women make slightly less in some situations for some jobs. Issue 2, men die earlier than women. These two issues are not even in the same realm of seriousness and urgency to solve.
I’d stop worrying about misogyny and start with some reflection on your own misandrist values.
Fucking hell, this pisses me off.
There is one constant with assholes: Any term or phrase can be used against someone else. It really doesn't matter what. When someone has an agenda to degrade another group of people, anything can be used as a weapon. The specifics have no meaning.
As far as your concern about this being used against someone else, sure. The most likely scenario is that this is picked up by some kind of partisan taking head and rebroadcast on a grander scale.
Turn of phrase.
Idk... "term or phrase" works at least as well as well imo.
They’ll do that either way.
That’s sad. Sigh.
if feminism has taught us nothing else (and it hasn't) the only way to bridge this gap is to bring women down to our level not raise men up.
No, the way this works is the problem will go unsolved and probably even unaddressed until someone explains how men dying early is a problem for women. Then it'll get attention. It's not a real problem until it hurts women--the real victims.
So... you expect women to solve a problem made by men for men? How novel.
Society does not perceive "men are suffering" as a problem, is my point.
I think we very much do understand it's a problem and there is not a whole lot women can do about it that we aren't already doing. The majority of feminists would love for men to see a fucking therapist. They keep fighting it tooth and nail, though.
They'll either not open up at all for fear of being judged, or they'll ONLY lean on the women in their life. The one or two women in their life, because in my anecdotal experience they don't seem to stick around women they can't sleep with.
You guys want and desperately need actual emotional support, but you seemingly refuse to support each other. When we tell you to so much as just give each other the compliments you're looking for, it's met with whining because the respondents want women to do it. Even though mainly the compliments we get are...also from women, and going along with this request puts us in harm's way.
A lot of men are so beat to shit from such an early age that they can't even put a name to a lot of emotions besides anger. Which causes them to be both unable to manage what they can barely explain, and to feel significantly uncomfortable (outmatched) in marriage counseling, watching their wife run circles around them.
But biting the bullet and improving on emotional literacy via counseling and/or self-study and deep reflection never seems to strike the fancy. Their date has to teach them. And they WILL be fighting every step of the way.
I would love to date someone who doesn't define their entire existence through their job. That's nearly the entire reason two out of my four relationships fell to pieces.
-I- didn't give a shit. I met one of them when we were both homeless and said yes anyway. But if I made more money or they got laid off at any point, both of them would have a months-long binge drinking breakdown regardless of what I said.
You know you could just stop, right? That's what's incredibly frustrating about this for me. A lot of problems that are specific to men seem to be an issue of self-image, and are thus self-imposed, and you could just. Stop.
I can't make anyone not pick me up by the throat, but any day you could just wake up and decide your paycheck doesn't actually fucking matter and never date someone who thinks it does.
You could be excruciatingly nice to people for no reason instead of demanding women do it, work out what's going on with you and tell people about it, and give them both barrels if they think a human being needing help is gay.
As much as I feel for men as a group, it's the empathetic part that makes me want to hold them upside down and shake them till the sense falls out. Take. Care of each other. Fix the thing.
It's kinda sad that when men have problems, they're just expected to solve it themselves.
Words like "self-imposed" are just thrown around to handwave their issues away. But no one asks why the men think this way. Are women completely blameless?
How would women react if men were to say the lack of female representation in STEM is "self-imposed" and that women should just stop not applying for those jobs because of fear. It's unrealistic right?