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Advice on helping a loved one through alcoholism? (lemm.ee)

submitted 2 years ago by Flickerby@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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My fiance has been struggling a lot lately with this and it's taking a toll on me. I'm doing all I can and all I know how to do but it's getting really hard and exhausting to deal with the constant cycle of abuse and then apology and then abuse and then apology over and over and over again for months. Usually day by day. I have convinced her to go to a counselor for help and she has an appointment set and seemed willing but she has kept up the cycle of drinking and I'm afraid she'll just ignore it or pretend to go. If anyone has experience helping a loved one through overcome this I would appreciate the help. She is an absolutely wonderful person when she is sober and I love her with all my heart but I'm not sure what else I can do and I don't want the rest of my life to consist of this.

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[–] Flickerby@lemm.ee 5 points 2 years ago (7 children)

Neither of us want children and yes I really true love her. I'm not planning on leaving her I just want to help her through this. I know she can do this and I believe in her and I'm not going to give up on her until she gives up on herself. I'd take a bullet for her no second thought.

[–] 0x4E4F -2 points 2 years ago (3 children)

IDK what to tell you... mood swings will most probably be a part of your life. She drank for a reason, it made her feel good. When she doesn't have that fix, she's most probably like you experience her now. She might get better with time (less abusive), than again, chances are (from my experience) that she won't.

[–] Flickerby@lemm.ee 5 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Well I had issues with drinking myself when I was younger and I got through it decently fine. I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience yourself but I'm really hoping it doesn't turn out that way here. Though I do know the possibility exists. When she's sober she still says she wants help. As long as she doesn't give up entirely on herself I'm not giving up on her either.

[–] 0x4E4F 1 points 2 years ago

Sorry, had to edit the post a few times.

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