this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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I don't know if this is what you're looking for, but I was so fortunate to find an amazing job where my coworkers treat me like a good person who has value.
I teach middle school, and I am just surrounded by hardworking teachers who treat each other well. We all compliment everyone behind their backs and to their faces. They tell me I'm good at my job and that I'm a nice person. I used to reply jokingly, "sometimes!" because I honestly could not accept that compliment.
This was incredibly hard for me to handle when I started teaching here. Never felt super loved at home as a kid, only person who told me I was unequivocally "good" was my grandmother, so deep down I always doubted it. I had serious imposter syndrome when people would say nice things to and about me. Still do from time to time, but overall I feel so much happier and more confident than ever before. This job is the best thing to ever happen to me. I'll work there until I retire - found my forever job. But you could do this without the job.
Surround yourself with people who know you're good. Be as good as you can be. And know that multiple narratives can be true - I know I have stepped on toes and put my foot in my mouth with coworkers who love me. I have kicked myself for it. But I truly believe that it's only a very small, very human part of the positive narrative we have all decided to focus on at my job. The positivity has bled into my home life too. I catch myself being better.
I guess what I'm saying is that some of this is "fake it til you make it, then realize you weren't faking it at all."