I was in the shower this morning when the thought occurred- is there some reason this shampoo bottle says "If ingested, get help or contact a Poison Control Centre right away" that we're not being told? It's not on the bottle. So I drank the bottle to test my hypothesis that it's Big Pharma lying to us.

Anyway so 5 minutes later I'm vomiting blood all over the room when the thought occurred- they do this so you'll have to visit a hospital and spend even MORE money. It's literally a conspiracy by a cabal between Big Pharma and the hospitals, and I guarantee Big Poison Control benefits from the increased call volume (m^3^). This is the new frontier of citizen science and I'm calling on all freethinkers to venture down the rabbit hole with me.

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[–] PorkrollPosadist@hexbear.net 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I throw out the icing packets and spread a rich layer of Herbal Essences conditioner on my Pillsbury toaster strudels every morning.