Lemmy Shitpost
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
view the rest of the comments
the irony is that this is actually such an easily attainable dream if i just used a dating app or socialized at a club
but ofc i had to become infatuated with 2 specific guys who are a challenge to get with
Jason Momoa and Peewee Herman?
Have you tried inviting them both to your place for a game of Uno? Then when they are there, say you'll go get the game, and show up ready wearing nothing but the Wild+2 card:
As long as they don't have this specific next card
you should have a good chance at achieving it.
Having been part of both MMF and FFM threesomes, this is very achievable. IMO, guys not being friends is a selling point for being down for a MMF and/or a DP, and horny guys are very easy to manipulate. (source: am lifelong horny guy)
My suggestion is, first off, ensure that at least one of them has a place with a queen-sized bed within a reasonable taxi ride from a bar or club you're comfortable with. Give them both the same line- you're meeting a friend at a bar/club and you want them to join ;) Make them each feel like the wanted, special one. Bring enough cash to pay for a whole night out to ease friction.
They can meet and talk, but don't let them talk much, and get them mobile and unable to bro out or fight. Dance, drink - talk to them as little as possible. Give subtle to start, then less subtle, physical cues - touch them on the arm, then the chest, then the leg or ass. Bounce back and forth and maintain control of the situation - you kiss first. Kiss the less aggressive one while touching the more aggressive one and pulling the more aggressive one to touch your body as you kiss the other one. Then swap, but give the more emotional contact like kissing for the more sensitive one, and let the less emotional one touch your body more in a sort of 2 to 1 ratio.
Then you run and they follow. Tell them both to come with you - the less aggressive one may take grabbing by the hand. Get a taxi fast, sit in the middle so they don't cross horny streams, and keep bouncing back and forth, alternating who gets contact from your face and hands - kiss one while teasing the other's business.
By the time you get them into the same place, 1) they will have zero comprehension of anything other than what their dicks want, but 2) you're in control and can make a pretty wide-reaching set of demands. You are the center of attention and decision-making.
Good luck!
Oh this reminds me so much of someone in real life. Do you keep trophies? The girl I'm thinking of stole guys cloths to put on a mannequin.
furiously scribbling notes
Just get dp'd by two randos, but make sure the guys you are into hear about it. Then they'll get jealous and dp you themselves!