this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2026
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To be clear, I'm responding to these statements.
My comments were never meant to defend the statements of that one commenter, just the idea that there are legitimate reasons that people may not be aware of this particular issue. No hard feelings.
All of those comments came AFTER you and favoredponcho decided I was being hostile for no reason.
Why do you feel like women are being hostile just by participating in discussion?
Why are you leading the question? Hostility is defined by the way you respond, it has nothing to do with your gender identity. And for no reason? Come on. I never claimed your initial comment was hostile, but your later comments disparaging anyone who wasn't aware of this are absolutely hostile. That has nothing to do with favoredponcho getting butthurt about downvotes. I apologize for coming on strong, that wasn't necessary, but the statements I called out are were valid criticisms. You're all over this thread calling out people's bad behavior, and again, I apologize for mine, but can you at least acknowledge that some of those statements were uncalled for?
What I said to favoredponcho was absolutely called for in my opinion. I did nothing but answer his question and I got called hostile and an asshole for it.
My comments to you were a bit harsh, but I'm still undecided whether I want to retract them or not. As far as I'm aware, I wasn't hostile to anyone in this thread unless they were a jerk back to me. I was simply participating in discussions.
Again, why didn't you reply to favoredponcho with his freakout at me and tell him to chill the fuck out? Why did you single ME out?
I didn't single you out, or I should say intend to single you out, but you already called out his bullshit. You did so though by throwing in your own bullshit (that nobody could possibly be unaware of one of the literally millions of issues in our hellish existence unless there was something wrong with them or they were lying).
He doubled down on his bullshit, and you continued in addressing that. I addressed your bullshit because I thought it should be addressed, admittedly by throwing in my own bullshit. I fucked up, I can admit that, but his bullshit doesn't excuse your bullshit, and your bullshit doesn't excuse my bullshit, and vice versa.
Everybody in this thread is getting heated and being shits in different ways. I've made my two cents, I apologize again for how I went about it, and I'm resigning myself from this thread. Have a good rest of your day.
Women don't have to stay meek and sweet in the face of being called a scold and an asshole for something as simple as answering a question. Favoredponcho revealed his own misogyny in his reply to me and I feel no qualms with being snarky back at him to be honest.
It is not my job to coddle men because I'm a woman. Period. I don't have to be sweet or nice or humble because a man has taken issue with my supposed tone.
I think you should examine why you singled out the woman in the argument on this particular topic to scold instead of the man who made it into an argument to begin with. You jumped in to help attack me with favoredponcho.
And I ask you to please consider that not everything has to do with your gender identity and just because somebody disagrees with you on something, that doesn't mean they endorse every other shitty idea put forth by every other asshole in the thread. Thank you!
It’s not just because you disagreed with me.
It’s because you saw a woman getting upset at a man’s aggressiveness and you decided to pile on the woman to tell her to stop being upset. You said so yourself.
Whether you recognize why you did so doesn’t matter to me. As an outspoken woman, I’ve encountered enough men that do this to know your motivations, subconscious or not.