this post was submitted on 15 Apr 2026
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33
Bottom dysphoria changing after HRT - why? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) by destase@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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I’ve been on HRT for about 6 weeks now and I’m pretty sure I’m at female levels. Got a late start at 29 and I still strongly doubt that I’m even trans and should be doing this (seriously, my story is a weird one I think). I would quite welcome being cis because that would mean I don’t have to upend my life and essentially start over under 10x more difficult conditions. I considered myself agender for a long time and maybe I am.

Before HRT I considered myself very much vers. I do understand that severe bottom dysphoria is not needed to be trans, and I intended to do maintenance to retain my ability to top. Now that I’m actually into it, my feelings have changed.

I’ve read that a full erection once a day is needed to reliably retain full function, but that sounds quite unpleasant to me now? I just don’t want to do it, and I don’t really care if I never use my genitals to top again. I’m also finding myself more welcoming to the idea of SRS.

  • Is it due to the nature of HRT and changing sex drive? I mean, duh, estrogen
  • Is it due to repression breaking? Was I masking dysphoria before?
  • Is it because I have read and internalized that this is how I should feel, in some people’s opinion, and I am conforming to that?

I don’t think it’s really the last one - I also understand I have more sexual/dating prospects if I’m vers, and I think I kinda care about that more than some fringe viewpoints about validity

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[–] thoughtfuldragon@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 4 days ago

Body doesn't equal gender so you may indeed be agender and find yourself more comfortable in a body with estrogen vs testosterone. Sex drive, desires about sex can change on HRT but there isn't research pointing at any particular cause. Mostly there's a noted correlation but that does not imply causation. There's a number of confounding factors that would make determining that definitively difficult. Dysphoria masking is a thing and it could be involved but that's not necessarily what's happening. There's certainly a possibility that you are adopting someone else's opinion of what your body should be.

My advice would to spend more time thinking about how you want to be, and what you might want to do about that. The best solution to figuring out what you want is to think about how you perceive things now, and consider if that's good and enjoyable for you or if it's not. And also to think about if changing something would make your experience better or meet a need you have.