this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] ajmaxwell@lemmy.world 66 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

You bet your ass he did.

When He had made a whip of cords, He drove them all out of the temple, with the sheep and the oxen, and poured out the changers’ money and overturned the tables.

https://biblehub.com/john/2-15.htm

[–] dvlsg@lemmy.world 7 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Supposedly he took hours to make the whip. Plenty of time to premeditate on that destruction.

[–] ajmaxwell@lemmy.world 7 points 2 hours ago

That's my favorite part. Spent the afternoon braiding a whip, probably mumbling to himself "Ohhh, these sons of bitches about to experience Wrath"

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 6 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I guess I could read John to understand the context.

[–] Rugnjr@lemmy.blahaj.zone 41 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

He's mad that people are selling stuff in the temple when it should be holy (and commercial activity is NOT holy)

[–] Hacksaw@lemmy.ca 35 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

It wasn't just commercial activity. Money changers were charging a fee to buy shekels which people could use to buy an animal to sacrifice at the temple. Jesus was mad because the idea of inserting yourself as a middleman to extort money from people seeking salvation was basically blasphemy.

[–] FrChazzz@lemmus.org 27 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Also lots of "well, you're animal isn't really pure enough. But you're in luck because we happen to have a few High Priest Certified^tm^ animals right over here. We'll just take yours on trade and you can pay the difference!" (then resell the perfectly good sacrificial animal to the next poor pilgrim who comes along)

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 11 hours ago

Yeah, that dog you came in with? It's really only 75% dog. You need 100% dog grade dog, now with extra bark, or your sins, I know this dude and he's going to make your sins not fall off the truck this year. I neeeeed that extra dog. Make with the extra twenty five percent dog please.

Sorry that's what comes to mind when you say my animal needs to be more pure. I'm not claiming it's clever, or funny, just that it's blasphemous woo