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oh, you right.
as an author, slurs in dialogue are really handy. they're intensely evocative phrases when spoken in anger or hate, and humanizing when spoken in jest. i just really hate it when someone goes on the internet to shoulder the plight of every ethnicity and creed and shouts on their assumed behalf, "no one should use mean words ever"
I think it's especially harmful; it's tantamount to pretending things don't happen. You need to show people being terrible in fiction for it to be a full portrayal of the human condition. It's part of what we were, it's part of what we are, and if we have any hope of making it not part of what we will be that's not going to come about by insisting we don't talk about it.