this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2026
40 points (93.5% liked)
Casual Conversation
3857 readers
147 users here now
Share a story, ask a question, or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. Maybe you'll make some friends in the process.
RULES
- Be respectful: no harassment, hate speech, bigotry, and/or trolling.
- Encourage conversation in your OP. This means including heavily implicative subject matter when you can and also engaging in your thread when possible.
- Avoid controversial topics (e.g. politics or societal debates).
- Stay calm: Don’t post angry or to vent or complain. We are a place where everyone can forget about their everyday or not so everyday worries for a moment. Venting, complaining, or posting from a place of anger or resentment doesn't fit the atmosphere we try to foster at all. Feel free to post those on !goodoffmychest@lemmy.world
- Keep it clean and SFW
- No solicitation such as ads, promotional content, spam, surveys etc.
Casual conversation communities:
- !casualuk@feddit.uk
- !casualeurope@piefed.social
- !forumlibre@jlai.lu
- !batepapo@lemmy.eco.br
- !esp@lemm.ee
Related discussion-focused communities
- !actual_discussion@lemmy.ca
- !askmenover30@lemm.ee
- !dads@feddit.uk
- !letstalkaboutgames@feddit.uk
- !movies@piefed.social
- !television@piefed.social
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
If you only reach out to someone with straightforward requests, it seems like they're being used. I value the hypothetical you as an individual, rather than a resource that provides me with something.
I've grown to realize that most other people don't seem to feel the same way and I try to accommodate, but every time I start a conversation with a demand, it feels rude to me.
Just curious: Would you consider it rude if someone else sends you a text with a straightforward request? Or do you just feel like it could be perceived as rude when you do it?
If the only messages I ever receive from that person are requests and demands, I don't know if I would call it rude from them, but I certainly wouldn't feel valued as a person.
Okay I get that. However, I feel like this has nothing to do with the original issue. If I only ever receive "requests and demands" from someone it would not make it any better if they beforehand say "hey, do you have time for a quick question" every time.
Of course I also text about other topics. Of course I ask how they are doing and chat about stuff. But when I have I question I simply ask that question.
I suppose that's a valid point, but engaging in discourse with a person before and, ideally, after a request seems to me to express that you appreciate them as both a person with whom you'd like to engage as well as someone who can help you. Admittedly the positive impact is diminished if you only do so when you need something.
It is highly dependent on the other person's interpretation of the situation. If they don't like to chat, then the person attempting to do so certainly could be interpreted as the rude one.