this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2026
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I see what you're saying here, yeah.
Digital etiquette has evolved a lot. Typically, these days, sending a message in your DMs is less like pulling you aside for a whisper and more like shouting inside your living room. The culture that's grown up around power-tripping mod bans, scams, and other awful shit has made messaging someone privately a delicate matter.
This person is being polite by knocking on your door to announce that they're already in your living room, and asking permission to speak with you. I see this as excellent behavior, filling a glaringly bad gap in user privacy protections on other platforms. They're being decent about an intrusion that's a (tragically common) built-in design flaw of the app.
This is interesting.
My lack of experience on most socials isn't helping. I've never used Snapchat Twitter Instagram tiktock etc. Pixelfed was my first venture into that realm, but i only use it as a person gallery and to check out interesting photography from others. I know it's modeled on Instagram, which has grown beyond that quite a bit, but that's never been for me though.
Anyway, thanks for the insight.
The Internet's grown up a lot. Different websites and apps will develop entire subcultures, with different slang, etiquette, politics, and posting standards. What's acceptable in one neighborhood will get you downvoted into oblivion somewhere else. Like the real world, everybody eventually finds their lunch table.
100% this. There are very specific kinds of communities that I gravitate towards. Forums, link aggregators, and the older social platforms like FB where are you friend actual friends. The lack of high-speed internet and mobile data made a lot of the other platforms less accessible to me as I've lived around the world. When you have a data budget, you don't tend to use media centric services where people scroll through content rapidly. I've also never really been into "following" strangers. I've only recently started doing it on Pixelfed because it helps further define the kind of photography and art I'm interested in looking at.
I pick things up and figure things out over time. Like 4chan green text which I never understood, but would see quoted on Lemmy or Reddit. I'll figure out these abbreviations and manners of speech as well... eventually..haha.