Six weeks seems excessive, are you sure you haven't just weeded out the people that have just a little less patience than you? Also some people are really good at hiding stuff and drop the real bombs after months or even years.

Six weeks is unrealistic to the point of self sabotage.

I found the best sequence is like

• opener question
• they give a good response
• follow up
• they give a good response
• maybe repeat once more if there's an obvious follow up
• clear any deal breakers (eg: if you have a kid)
• ask them out

If they don't give good responses, bail.

You're going to get a lot more information meeting in person. Going for drinks or coffee or whatever is a couple hours and few bucks.

I work in a corpo, I hate text/call communication as it's what I do daily. For me it's: an opener, followup or three, then ask them out.

I ask people out after a few messages. I don't have time to waste talking to people for 6 weeks, and frankly they ghost me after a few messages because they also don't want to message back and forth.

The incompatibility isn't in the messaging, it's in the physical face to face date. Just because someone looks cute in their pictures doesn't mean it will translate to any real world attraction. Hence, get to the date as soon as possible and don't build somebody up via messaging. I'm looking for truth, not some fantasy chat bot.

Everyone is positive and wonderful when they message you. It's only person to person, when they feel comfortable, they open up and show you who they really are. Just like most of my exes, were great, until they decided they no longer had to 'make an effort' with me and told me truth about themselves that ended the relationship.

Heck, this woman I'm talking about above, said she likes kids and pets and wanted kids and pets... then on the date, she said the exact opposite. In messaging, she loved her dog, and dogs are great. In person, it was "i only got this dog because my ex likes dogs and I don't really like it but I'm stuck with it until it dies." I encounter that a lot too. A lot of people lie because they want other people to like them and they give the 'popular' answer. But face to face, that is much harder to do than it is text messages. In person it's easy to have a drink or two, and let people talk until they show you what they really feel and think deep down.

I'm looking for something and someone real. I'm never going to get that from texting people or pursuing casual relationships. Only way to get it is legit conversation one on one an getting them to open up. I don't want to interact with someone for weeks or months with them lying to me about how they like kids and dogs when I can get it done in a few days and I can move on to the next person who maybe actually does like kids and dogs and isn't saying they do like them because they want to bone me.